[ATLian]

Kemi,

I'll ignore your insults. Insults in an argument are normally a sign of a man who has nothing constructive left to say.

Anyway, I was a Christian who believed and followed the Bible for a long part of my life. I read the Bible just like you did, went for all the confirmation classes, Bible study, Sunday School, church, studied CRE in high school, the works. What makes you think I don't understand tha Bible? You think that I lost all the understanding I had when I became an atheist?



>I'll point you to merriam webster for the definition of
>'wife'(which is what the bible is talking about) and
>'girlfriend' and even 'fiance'. www.m-w.com.

I don't care what any dictionary says. You stated that god allows men to dart any chic as long as she's not a wife, even a chic who's engaged to somebody else, or even a chic who has been seeing another man for years. I want to know where in the Bible god says this. Show me the verse.

I think you put your foot in your mouth by attributing to god something he didn't say. Now you're faced with the embarassment of acknowledging that you lied. Of course you can never admit that, so you do what kemi usually does - start the matusi.

[key-pusa]

@Kemi, you know you're wrong on this. There's no way you can justify your reply, and as ATLian has quoted the verse for you in the Bible, God clearly states "...do not covet...anything that belongs to your neighbor..." I say pull out your Bible and read that verse. "Anything" here includes your neighbor's wife, girlfriend, fiance, even f*ck buddy. There.

[KEMINOKANA]

Keypusa,

The keywod is BELONGS TO. A girlfriend DOES NOT BELONG to a man. Read the bible well and u'll understand what BELONGING to a man AS A WOMAN means.

To make it easier for yall, a girlfriend/bf is someone ur dating to see IF you can marry/her him. The KEYWORD IS 'IF'. A wife biblically is a union(KEYWORDS ARE 'IS A UNION') put together by God and he's clearly said, LET NO ONE PUT ASUNDER WHAT HE'S UNITED. HE HAS NOT united a gf to a bf AND CERTAINLY NOT #### BUDDIES! What is so hard in this simple clear cut issue?

If we all went by your standards, we all would be single because people date for the purpose of finding the ultimate person and that entails leaving a man/woman you do not deem fit for someone you deem fitter.

The only biblical concept you'd use is the one that says, do unto others as you'd like them to do unto you. That commandment is only applicable to wives/husbands.

[Whitehead]

There are some questions you should always ask within the first moments of meeting if you are attracted to someone..its something else if she had a dude and she lied to you. But in this case it is obvious that you based your phone calls on assumptions. Please don't even drag Christianity into this. The lord says not to use his name in vain especially when it is obvious that you lacked common sense.

Feel bad for now lakini you will get over it. Next time, ask the girl if she is dating first. Even if she says no ask her if she is "talking" to other people so that you don't get a shock of your life after building aircastles.

[key-pusa]

>Keypusa,
>
> The keywod is BELONGS TO. A girlfriend DOES NOT BELONG to a
>man. Read the bible well and u'll understand what BELONGING to
>a man AS A WOMAN means.
>
>To make it easier for yall, a girlfriend/bf is someone ur
>dating to see IF you can marry/her him. The KEYWORD IS 'IF'. A
>wife biblically is a union(KEYWORDS ARE 'IS A UNION') put
>together by God and he's clearly said, LET NO ONE PUT ASUNDER
>WHAT HE'S UNITED. HE HAS NOT united a gf to a bf AND CERTAINLY
>NOT #### BUDDIES! What is so hard in this simple clear cut
>issue?
>
>If we all went by your standards, we all would be single
>because people date for the purpose of finding the ultimate
>person and that entails leaving a man/woman you do not deem
>fit for someone you deem fitter.
>
>The only biblical concept you'd use is the one that says, do
>unto others as you'd like them to do unto you. That
>commandment is only applicable to wives/husbands.

Come on hon, let's not squabble over semantics, huh? This is exactly why most protestants believe in the phenomenon called "Rapture" while others, like SDA's, don't even believe hell is a physical place. It's a matter of how you choose to interpret the Bible. We all read the same thing and get different meanings out of it, no point haggling about who's right and who's not. Let's not spoil this poor guy's post. He's looking for constructive advice. Enjoy your weekend :)

@Poster, one thing I've noticed most guys do is assume that just cuz a girl's nice to them, then she's probably interested romantically. You met a nice, christian girl who was friendly with you, fell for her and assumed that if she was being so friendly, then she must be as romantically interested as you are. That was your mistake right there. If she's been in a 3 year relationship, she's definitely serious about her boyfriend and they probably have long term goals of getting married. Just accept her friendship for what it is and next time don't make assumptions. If you're interested in a girl romantically, be sure to find out early on whether or not she's hooked up, ok? Sorry for the disappointment, but you'll get over it and meet an even better girl. Now stop sulking and thank God that the situation wasn't much worse.

[m kenya]

>Hi Mashada Brethren,
>
>On a recent mission trip to a neighbouring country of Kenya, i
>got to meet this most amazing born again lady...yaani in many
>ways the woman of my dreams. Anyway we have been in
>communiocation since and it waas just juzi that my whole world
>came crashing down when she mentioned that she has a
>boyfriend! They have been going out for some 3 years.
>
>My immediate reaction has been to take flight i.e. end the
>friendship subtley and move on yaani trusting that God would
>bring me His choice in His own good time. Having been
>heartbroken enough times, i can say that i am a good healer
>and most likely this time next month i would be sawa, but i am
>still wondering whether i am being trully of Christ by taking
>off.
>
>So my dear friends, please advice on two questions;
>
>1.) What would you do / what does one do in such a situation
>i.e. there is the possibility that like many born-again dada's
>today who may not be seeing their husbands as the enemy has
>them bound by counterfeits so is it wise to seek God more over
>this? Remember the story of how God gave the Israelites the
>promised land but that they had to battle to claim it as there
>were other peoples there.
>
>2.) How can i be able to discern God's will for me about a
>spouse as well as what are the common things to look out for
>when seeking God's choice.
>
>Yaani i would really appreciate your answers.


Mteule..
Matthew 6:7 says this clearly: Your Father knows what you need before you ask him. Most def, God knew what kinda chick u needed like the moment the desire came into your heart. And he says that marriage is honourable. So on theh issue of finding a wife, i think u are pretty much on the right path.
However, remember the story of Elijah as he was running away from Ahab and Jezebel and he ended up in a cave, and then a strong wind came but the bible sez that the Lord was not in the wind, neither was the Lord in the earthquake that followed.
For the Bible to mention what ave jus written is to imply that Elijah may have looked for signs of God in those happenings.
You are in the same predicament my broda, you have simply jumped the gun.
Fact is, if that lady aint lying, and she has been going strong for 3years plus, quit waiting. God is proabably in her plans.
And i doubt God will disposses another brother in order to fill ur cup.
So do this, learn a lesson. what is the lesson..
Uliza mapema...that way u don give space to fantasies which carry your expectations to cloud 20.

Secondly, what i've learnt in my short christian walk is this, when God answers your prayers, he does it soo "fittingly" there is little room for other extraneous explanations. It just fits, and u will happen to be in the right time at the right place and u will say the right things, and it will work. Thats how i got my first jobo here, todate i can tell u that the way God opened this dooor, it was just God and God and God, there is No way with all the education that i have that i can explain how events happened. (Though i had prayed for the job)

But..you are having doubts and are second guessing, even thinking of overthrowing another "serikali" in the mistaken assumption that God would like u to fight for the "promised land"...hapana dugu yagu...
Learning to really trust God in the way that He wants you to fully trust Him is an all-or-nothing principle. You're either going to fully trust Him with every area of your life or you are not. The minute you start waffling and trying to straddle the fence post with Him on this issue - you will become what the Bible says is a wavering and double-minded man who will become unstable in all of his ways.

Ok..i am NOT saying my life is in order, neither am i implying that i am a hero of faith...pole if i sound extreme. But here are some verses for you

Commit your way to the Lord, trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass Psalm 37:4-7)

Blessed is the man who trusts in Him! Oh, fear the Lord, you His saints! There is no want to those who fear Him ... But those who seek the Lord shall not lack any good thing." (Psalm 34:8-10)