[Coach]

In my limited view, there are three ways we can communicate (you probably have many more but please let's try and concentrate on this for now);

1. Like children - people try to outshine each other and do not listen to each other, when you say one thing the next person comes along and tries to outdo you. In this mode, the person doesn't listen to you but is always trying to be "better". This brings about belitting, patronising, insults and brushing off of what someone else is saying.

2. Like Adults - People listen to each other, respect each others views and share knowledge and information, they enlighten each other and this atmosphere makes it easy to be around each other. This is an ideal mode of communication.

3. Like Parents - this is a superior position adopted by the person who thinks he/she knows better. The person always thinks what they have to say say has more validity, truth and relevance. It is very similar to a parent admonishing a child who is 'kichwa ngumu'.

In this forum, the mode of communication is often the first or the last, not the mode of communcation that yields good results and creates a good atmosphere for discussion. Afterall, discussion is the key word here (not proselytizing or trying to show superiority).

In normal conversations, people can fall into this common trap...

If one person adopts a 'childish' attitude the person responding [instead of acting like an adult] is very likely to fall into the first category or the last (i.e. either they will try to outshine and outdo the person or they will adopt a superior position to try to render the argument invalid).

If the person adopts a "parent-like" attitude, the person responding commonly adopts a childish position and tries to "childishly" rubbish the position held not because they don't agree with it but mostly because they don't agree with the tone and behaviour of the person adopting a superior position.

What I'm trying to say in many words is, let's make this forum a better place by stopping all the childish and superiority complex that is often common here. Let us listen to each other, respect each others positions, faiths etc and hopefully learn from each other. From the impatient you can learn patience, from the frivolous we can learn about being sound and from a person of another faith you can learn a lot about your own (either through their questions, assumptions or their own research). Let's not constantly criticize each other and instead (if one has something you don't agree with) put up your criticism in a constructive manner that will facilitate for discussion/debate instead of putting it in a way that will often lead to spite, contempt and competition in trying to outdo each other. I'm not saying we should write essays, all I'm saying is...let's atleast be civil!






"The ink of the scholar is more sacred than the blood of the martyr" Prophet Muhammad PBUH

[kennygyks]

I'm not saying we should write essays, all
>I'm saying is...let's atleast be civil!


http://www.safety-identification-pro...get-sample.jpg

[Coach]

kennygyks,
Is it too much to ask?


"The ink of the scholar is more sacred than the blood of the martyr" Prophet Muhammad PBUH

[Zelda]

nice post.

[satjas]

reading between the lines the hidden message......"don't protest against anything i have to say", Coach, "you unbelievers".

-the paradigm shifter....God's friend.

ps. do you think we could abrogate this statement if i'm proved wrong? if MooHamMad could do it in the kooran why not I? aren't we to follow his example?

The soul is that which beholds beauty even when the mind denies it.

[Jibril Cessay]

Turkish hijacker,looking to Pope, gives up in Italy....

http://today.reuters.com/news/articl...c=66&type=qcna

That alone tells u that any further discussion will be stifled by prevaricating dogma and we'll be accused of heresy just like the Pope, Ayaan Hirsi and Rushdie.

[spairo]

Gosh! We are having in a bigger problem than I thought, a very innocent mail, a topic on reconciliation for the upright thinker has been turn to be a field of abuse. Why do you people, the unbeliever especially, think like KIDS always?….you just make me sick in this holy Month of Ramadhan!

[teejay]

>Gosh! We are having in a bigger problem than I thought, a
>very innocent mail, a topic on reconciliation for the upright
>thinker has been turn to be a field of abuse. Why do you
>people, the unbeliever especially, think like KIDS
>always?


According to you spairo in http://www.mashada.com/forums/index/...3699/index.php.
....a Kafir is anybody who goes against the teaching of Quran. The Islamic unbeliever can also be a Kafir, right? This means that even Non-Muslims of other religions are Kafirs since they dont observe Quranic doctrine.And that means that you just lumped us all in one group - Kids

What if I said that you muslims are being mislead by Mohammed's fallacies and that it would be good for you to seek true light.

[Mbajuni]

>kennygyks,
>Is it too much to ask?
>
>
>"The ink of the scholar is more sacred than the blood of the
>martyr" Prophet Muhammad PBUH


By now Coach you should know, like I have finally learnt, how things will never change on this Mashada forum. One starts an innocent comment asking for reconciliation and not directed towards any religion, and someone has to bring hate into it directed at one religion.

If you haven't noticed, it is the same way for pictures posted on this website. People always have to hate on a picture even though you posted it with all good intentions and you are looking the finest ever. I am wondering if it's a Kenyan thing to just hate and bicker. That is why I have given up on trying to have a civil conversation on Mashada. Since my time could be better spent elsewhere, I think I will officially leave this website. Was nice knowing you all and unfortunate knowing others...

[dadyamaru]

From your responses all , you ave placed yourselves in the mentioned categories.

so now i knw who am dealing with