[msomi06]

Personaly am a single parent to a 5 yr old boy. U go out with someone and things dont work out....u agree to part ways coz there is no need to bring up a kid in an environment where everyone is just screaming his/her head off just to pass a message across. Am never embarrased to go anywhere with him coz he knows if he misbehaves, i will do the necessary. In school ave given his teacher the right to displine him when he gets too cheeky and i must say he's an ok boy....infact most pple ask kama ni wangu kweli coz even if we go to the supermarket he never "screams" for stuff, we always decide wat he'll get before we even enter the supermarket. So, mtoto umleavyo ndivyo akuavyo....hata akiwa na both parents or 1 parent...

@ Wanjala.....your comments made a nice read.

[OOWITI]

Originally Posted by Shyloxx26

All I can say is, no one chooses where to be born or who bears them. We all just happen (though after reading a book on Near Death Experience) I tend to disagree wit this. Anyhoo, times change. But things get worse before they get bette - remember the saying it is darkest just before sunrise?! Yeah!

The best thing a man can do for his kids is to love their mother
When a man loves a woman

[mo-uk]

From a sociology point of view, single mothers are troubled because the presence of a father is missing. Studies have showed children without their father display deviant behaviour at school and in relationships. However I personally believe otherwise. A child needs nothing more then their mother, a carer and emotional healer.

[OOWITI]

it takes a whole village to raise a child

[oscarwilde]

Originally Posted by dotNet

Whats wrong with parents nowadays.
Most kiddos brought up by single parents wanna issues mob sana. From emotional, self-esteem to identity issues. Is the problem with the parents or the society?

When you find a woman who spits too much fire at men, men this men that, si unajua? Ukiget boy who can't even have a one week relationship.. uliza swali utaambiwa penye kuna kasoro.

I think it would be too harsh to say every single parent set up is bound to produce a little rascal of a kid. It all boils down to what kind of parent is raising the kid. A social- economic study concluded that more than anything else, the parent's total personality and character is the most potent factor in what children turn out to be. And while I agree most single parents tend to be overdependent and over-endearing with their kids, I have also met strong, dedicated and successful single parents.

More than that, this is africa. Its not the west where u have to schedule an appointment to see ur relas- kids can find stability and love in the extended family of whichever parent they live with. Heck, we might not have single parent benefits from the govt but who can honestly say they ran out of relas willing to help with their kids.

[oscarwilde]

and f** what the sociologists say condemning kids to a life of deviance and underachievement just coz they're raised without one of the parents. I say if your a single parent,pull up ur socks and realise u got a lot of work to do. Its ur kid and they didn't sign up for it so no matter how tough it is huyo mtoto lazima ata tow the line

[awtkast]

Originally Posted by sdolphin

I have said this several times here.
Needing a man has connotations of; your life is not complete with a man. If one is to view life this way to me it means i am living half a life because i am single.
How then can you enter into a r/ship as half the person you can really be. You would than be looking to the man to confirm everything decision you make, you would never have a mind of your own.
A woman would end up being a burden to the man because she would be like another child, always seeking approval from the man. Like Shy said we are a complete entity as are men.

We need oxygen to breath. I want a man, i don't need him.

No man/woman is an island..they say men are excellent strategists, women r good managers..those two make up awesome collabo n life is made easy..even the best company CEO's consult..so this idea of women goin it alone in the name of..ati You would than be looking to the man to confirm everything decision you make, you would never have a mind of your own. is completely misguided n unfortunately when reality checks in, the victims still drunken by stupid egos go down the grave with utter bitterness n want others to justify their misdeeds..maybe divine intervention in its pureform--no interpretations! should help here.

[awtkast]

Originally Posted by Mishky

@ sdolphin....let me translate in swahili

"Nimesema gila mara gwa mara gatiga marethio(Maredio), gathiga mathelevisheni na hatha magasethi( Magazeti) gwamba jhugumu ya gila mghenya( Mkenya) mzalendo ni guhagikisa gwamba ghenya(Kenya) inaendelea Mbele"....former president MOI......hehe

[OOWITI]

Originally Posted by dotNet

We all agree that single parents have it rough, the problem is that a majority of young gurls are getting pregnant with no idea of how to bring up their kids. The best they can do is ape what they see on tv. I like the way someone put it.. good African Morals!!

Where are the men? where are the Fathers of these children?Too irresponsible to support their child and childs"s mother? Men we are to blame for this!!!!
Thumbs up for every single woman who has brought up her child /children by herself and shame on to those Fathers who want to be in the picture when the child is successful or not in the picture when a child grows up in trouble with the law.There are so many marriages where the Father is emotionally abscent and the outcomes of the children are what is causing violence and rages in societies coz of bottled up anger and resentment from their childhood not neccessarily because their mother was singe but the father was present but abscent emotionally.!!
Living With a Killer

[a.wanjala]

thanks....I had even forgotten I had written that.