My gal had an abortion......

Tactician · (#1 (**permalink**))

We were in bed recently with my gal and just out of the blue she started confessing stuff...

She told me that she had an abortion like 4 years ago when she was in school. I had not met her by then.

Only the jamaa responsible, his sister and her best friend then are aware of this - none of her paros or her present galfriends know.

Now am wondering, what on earth inspired her to tell me? I had never asked her about stuff like that - she just started telling me storos and was crying like a baby when she told me that.

I of course was taken aback as i didnt expect it but i comforted her and told her that I cant change what happened years ago and i still penda her the way she is which is the truth.

Secondly, on the same night she confessed (again without me asking her) about her ex (another one).

She had been lying to me that she had cut communication with him. But this night she confessed that they had been talking kila siku on the fon but she is not interested in him as all he does is talk and is too busy to see her unlike me who sees her every 2 weeks or so (she lives in a different town from me)

My question to mashada ladies is - what would drive you to confess stuff like that especially when its so personal and there's no way of me finding out? Especially since she was in a diff country when she aborted and the jamaa lives like 500km away from me?

And about this ex, why would she lie to me and confess now? May be she wants me to know there's compe ama?

The reason am asking is that this chic will be coming to visit some of her relas in my town and we had planned that she will stay with me for some time...

Of cos after these revelations am wondering what else she could be hiding from me....

and could she be doing these so as to test me? or perharps scare me so that i can leave her?

Mashada ladies, where are you? what could be going through her mind? I have tried thinking lakini only a woman can know what a woman thinks ama?

thanks

grip_daddy · (#2 (**permalink**))

Lots of confessions, forgiveness threads, confusions, and what to do.

Why would one lie about the past? To have you.

Why would one reveal the past? Either because she is making up with her ex, and she wants you to do the booting. Or, she wants a next level relationship.

Again, what to do?

YB* · (#3 (**permalink**))

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tactician

She had been lying to me that she had cut communication with him. But this night she confessed that they had been talking kila siku on the fon but she is not interested in him as all he does is talk and is too busy to see her unlike me who sees her every 2 weeks or so (she lives in a different town from me)

Funny had sorta the same questions today.

Lakini see what I have quoted above, You are not loved, You are convenient, once he decides to go after "the one that got away", you are history. Am almost certain the guy who has no time is older than you.

Tactician · (#4 (**permalink**))

Quote:

Originally Posted by YB*

Funny had sorta the same questions today.

Lakini see what I have quoted above, You are not loved, You are convenient, once he decides to go after "the one that got away", you are history. Am almost certain the guy who has no time is older than you.

Yea he is older than me by 5 years, and am older than her by 7 years.

Now that you have mentioned about convenience, this other jamaa is going back to his home country next month (he is asian).

In fact i remember it occurred to me there and then while still lying in bed that she is telling me all these cos the jamaa has told her that he is flying out. Otherwise, had he not been going, i would not have known.

Not to mention that she had lied to me that he was out of the country, kumbe he is in Nai all the time!

Am thinking that this ka-chic is playing around and sees an easy exit plan.

Hebu gimme advice cos am thinking either she comes we stay together ama i do the dishonourable thing and play her vibaya like.....

KILL PROPAGANDA · (#5 (**permalink**))

You are being played like a monopoly board.
You are being used like a Ratchet screwdriver.

Get out of that bogus relationship now.

KILL PROPAGANDA · (#6 (**permalink**))

I have observed many such girls in Nairobi. They are a waste of your prcious time and a drain on your otherwise useful energy.

jungunijinga · (#7 (**permalink**))

[quote=Tactician;664845]We were in bed recently with my gal and just out of the blue she started confessing stuff...

Now am wondering, what on earth inspired her to tell me? I had never asked her about stuff like that - she just started telling me storos and was crying like a baby when she told me that.

I'm trying to put myself in her shoes. For starters I believe that she's trying to grab your attention and get emotionally attached to you, but you seem to be distant.

She had been lying to me that she had cut communication with him. But this night she confessed that they had been talking kila siku on the fon but she is not interested in him as all he does is talk and is too busy to see her unlike me who sees her every 2 weeks or so (she lives in a different town from me)

I'd imagine that the chic really likes you, but you leave her emotionally dissatisfied, and that's why she's cheating on you (sort'a, by being in touch with the other guy).

And about this ex, why would she lie to me and confess now? May be she wants me to know there's compe ama?

Don't think so. The girl's lonely!!! She wants more from you!!
She may not know how to broach the subject of you not being there enough, ama she doesnt even know why she's doing what she's doing.

nyanam · (#8 (**permalink**))

@ Tactician, read jungunijinga's post. that's exactly what i think. by the way jungunijinga, u a man ama a gal?

that confession about another man is just to get you jealous and make u know kuna compee which might not even be the case. she just wants you to do more.
i would advise you to have another talk with her, but this time not in bed lol. a sober, mature and serious talk about your relationship and what you both feel can make it grow. dont give up now.that gal adores you.

YB* · (#9 (**permalink**))

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tactician

She had been lying to me that she had cut communication with him.

I do disagree with Nyanam and Jungunijinga to some extent, I really dont dig that '4 x 4 relay' relationship movement (passing the love baton while in motion), these women who never seem to have a definite gap between men are very dangerous, they are masters in seamless transition, and the problem with seamless transition is at one time or one time period two people are holding the baton - get my drift - the old and the new are in one spot.

2ndly, but maybe this is just me, what does one mean when they say they cut all communications with their ex?? Somewhere there kuna kitu worth knowing.

Thats another red herring to me, huyu mtu ulikuwa ume mpa your heart and access to other 'paraphernalia' in and on your body, the least you could be is friends. All my exes are friends, and my partners ex is my drink buddy (dont worry - we dont broach some subjects, and yes I knew him after she introduced us, we became friends) deals with the cheating bit.

We jipange ukijua ni rebound, you will quickly find out that sometimes mama's tell you an emotional never revealed before story to tie you up, so here you are wondering whether to leave, and your conscience is like, but you are the only one who understands her, saa hiyo she has more drama than desperate housewives and American idol combined. Run for the hills brother, or just jua its a rebound thing.

nyanam · (#10 (**permalink**))

YB* you could be right, but women sometimes do silly things to get a man's attention. its no wonder men say we are difficult to understand.in her mind she thinks the guy knows what she wants but as in this case, she only managed to confuse the guy.