Women in physically abusive relationships. - Page 6

OOWITI · (#51 (**permalink**))

I got flowers today. It wasn't my birthday or any other special day.
We had our first argument last night, And he said a lot of cruel things that really hurt me. I know he is sorry and didn't mean the things he said

Because he sent me flowers today.

I got flowers today. It wasn't our anniversary or any other special day. Last night, he threw me into a wall and started to choke me. It seemed like a
nightmare. I couldn't believe it was real. I woke up this morning sore and bruised all over. I know he must be sorry,

Because he sent me flowers today.

I got flowers today, and it wasn't Mother's Day or any other special day. Last night, he beat me up again. And it was much worse than all the other times. If I leave him, what will I do? How will I take care of my kids? What about money? I'm afraid of him and scared to leave. But I know he must be sorry,

Because he sent me flowers today.

I got flowers today. Today was a very special day. It was the day of my funeral. Last night, he finally killed me. He beat me to death. If only I had gathered enough courage and strength to leave him, I would not have gotten flowers today.
1992, Paulette Kelly. Reprinted with permission of the author.

OOWITI · (#52 (**permalink**))

[b][/B] this mothers day do you know how many kenyan women abroad will spend MOTHERS DAY IN A SHELTER running away from abuse while their husbands have made sure they have sent their own mothers in kenya flowers and gifts with her money in kenya?
This mothers day let us seel peace and justice for this women and their children by speaking out,praying and participating to create a safe world for mothers and children.Activate yourself on mothers day and speak about violence against mothers.You have the power the tools and knowledge from this thread alone.
Let us not just send cards and flowers and lunches on mothers day.As a community of men lets stop the violence.we need to make the abusers accountable through the justice system and by exposing them abroad and back home.Domestic violence destroys homes and communities.

Mudesh · (#53 (**permalink**))

Quote:

Originally Posted by von

Just when I thought that we are in the 21st century, I have to say that I am shocked about what is going on in my close friend's life. She just confided in me that her partner always gets physical whenever they have an argument. Is there a reason why anyone would have to put up with this?

you kno this is what i realized in women who always get beat!
kama ajachapwa for two weeks straight she'll intesionaly break a plate in front of her man!!! then you hear another loud nini

so if she says that she love her man then she loves her man!
kwani iko nini?

OOWITI · (#54 (**permalink**))

Quote:

Originally Posted by mudesh

you kno this is what i realized in women who always get beat! kama ajachapwa for two weeks straight she'll intesionaly break a plate in front of her man!!! then you hear another loud nini

so if she says that she love her man then she loves her man! kwani iko nini?

women who always get beat? my question is "why does he choose violence??"this is big time blame shifting a form of manipulation and psychological abuse using mind games used by the abuser.blaming others or others behaviour for violence is an escape mechanism which helps an abuser avoid consequences and to justify his violence by making excuses.it is what lundy bancroft [author] calls externalization of responsibilty where the abuser shifts blame to the partner. but why use violence???