[beyutifulll2005]

your problem is simply that you are still in love with your ex. you can obviously not see her now but if you ever do, believe me, them feelings you have now will be so much then.

have fun, but dont ever forget to give thanks to the one who gave you life

http://www.mtv.com/shared/media/news...ress-light.jpg

[milanya]

of course u can love more than one person, just not equally. The reason u still think about that woman is because u didnt close that chapter. You have one foot in the door and the other in the hallway. I dated a jamaa like u once. His ex broke his heart so bad. They didnt discuss it, he just said he didnt ever wanna see her again. He was good to me but talked and thought about her all the time. I was worried he was in love with her even if they'd been apart 4 years. One day she wrote him a letter and explained everything she did. Then he wrote back and explained his frustration, cussed and did whatever and forgave her. Then he finally moved on. He barely remembers her today...He just needed closure.
Life's not a garden so don't be a hoe

[Kinene wa Karani]

A parent can love all the kids, differently but all the same, love. I think a man can love two or more women at the same time. I have never loved two women at the same time, usually, when one is in love, it is like crazy, you eat, think, drink, dream, talk and hear only her. If love fades or dies, you start looking elsewhere, so I guess you are not loving two women, you stop loving one first... well, am getting confused already. I quit

http://www.blackagenda.com/images/cyber/malcolm-01.jpg "I believe in the brotherhood of man, all men, but I don’t believe in brotherhood with anybody who doesn’t want brotherhood with me."

[Whitehead]

Its more to do with closure than anything. Jamaas usually have a hard time ending relationships "the right way"...in fact I was just thinking about that today. They either do something to hurt the girl or they just keep it hanging but never talk about formal ending...Ive noticed this trend that a guy will never ever hold a discussion with you about breaking up EVER! They either can't handle it or ..I dont get it at all. It helps when you talk to a chille like a man and tell her to her face that the relationship has to end for reasons ABC...and then people move on and life is very easy.

Yep the contributor that I agree with is the one that talked about closure. Its very easy. Pull your guts together and TALK TO THE GIRL....it doesnt kill.

Whead.

PS: A friend of mine (not me) was into a certain dude only until her ex came back into the picture (the relationship had ended) and complicated things by "undoing" the closure..now she is in love with two dudes just coz of lack of closure I am sure that once she gets closure with the stupid ex shell love only that one dude lol. Not me by the way.

Peace.

[chotadipo]

>Its more to do with closure than anything. Jamaas usually
>have a hard time ending relationships "the right way"...in
>fact I was just thinking about that today. They either do
>something to hurt the girl or they just keep it hanging but
>never talk about formal ending...Ive noticed this trend that a
>guy will never ever hold a discussion with you about breaking
>up EVER! They either can't handle it or ..I dont get it at
>all. It helps when you talk to a chille like a man and tell
>her to her face that the relationship has to end for reasons
>ABC...and then people move on and life is very easy.
>
>Yep the contributor that I agree with is the one that talked
>about closure. Its very easy. Pull your guts together and TALK
>TO THE GIRL....it doesnt kill.
>
>Whead.
>
>PS: A friend of mine (not me) was into a certain dude only
>until her ex came back into the picture (the relationship had
>ended) and complicated things by "undoing" the closure..now
>she is in love with two dudes just coz of lack of closure I am
>sure that once she gets closure with the stupid ex shell love
>only that one dude lol. Not me by the way.
>
>Peace.
>
>
I think it is insensitive to tell someone on their face that IT IS ALL OVER. The beauty about language is that it takes many forms and there are less subtle ways of communicating.

Having said that, I think the overriding factor is the hurt. It is good to mitigate it by being non confrontational even if you may appear to be vague, and letting time soften the heart.

I would not like anybody to leave me by calling up a meeting and telling me on the face whether directly or in so many words that they are LEAVING ME. You see sanity is not a gurantee, it really depends...

[Dashir]

You are all wrong on this one, I think.
This is a classic case of "the-good-old-days". It's a myth. You over romantisize the old relationship, spend your time reminiscing over the times you spent together and create this grandiose image of who they were. This results from your being out of touch with them, going through some tough times and holiday blues.

The cure is to talk, at length, with the former partner and you will see them as human and current as opposed to angelic and perfect. Stick with the one you are with.