SAY ANYTHING YOU WISH TO SAY - Page 3

10inch · (#21 (**permalink**))

I'm The Center of the Universe.

I'm better than everyone. I kick asss at everything. The other day, someone cut me off on the freeway, so I sped up beside him and I rammed him off the road. Nobody is as good as I am.

Some people think I'm conceited...... Oh well.

All my friends think I'm better than they are. Sometimes my friends ask "So how come you rule so much?"

One time I decided to play basketball, but I suck at basketball so I lost. Just kidding, I kicked everyone's ass because I'm the best.

I own everyone at everything. There's no use in trying to be as good as me because it's impossible. There aren't enough words to describe how good I am.

THE UNIVERSE REVOLVES AROUND ME.
I AM KING. Everyone wishes they were me. EVERYONE. I AM A PIRATE, AND PIRATES RULE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If I weren't me, I'd wish I was.

I love me.

ojwang · (#22 (**permalink**))

>actually i'm looking forward to the new earth .. things will be >better, no suffering no pain

@pitpit
Ain't you living a utopian life?

pussycat · (#23 (**permalink**))

I think 10inch has been sniffing what Castro grows:)

"On the other side of Love, there's Repulsion" Freud

silva · (#24 (**permalink**))

tinkerbell,
am a bit excited but the morning sickness is REALLY getting to me. cant eat the WHOLE day and i throw up ceaselessly.... which is funny since i dont have anything in my tummy ANYWAY! this kid and its dad are going to PAY BIIGTIME!!!

tanya · (#25 (**permalink**))

jmburus@ lmaooooo this one has made my day. U won....

***God grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change, courage to change the things i can , and wisdom to know the difference.*******

coccus · (#26 (**permalink**))

Signs of Africa
In a restaurant in Zambia - "Open seven days a week and weekends."

On the grounds of a private school in South Africa - "No trespassing
without permission"

On a window of a Nigerian shop: "Why go elsewhere to be cheated when you
can come here?"

On a poster in Ghana: "Are you an adult who cannot read? if so, we can
help."

In a hotel in Mozambique: "Visitors are expected to complain at the office
between the hours of 9.00am and 11.00am daily."

On a river in the Democratic Republic of Congo: "Take note: when this sign
is submerged, the river is impassable."

In a Zimbabwean resturant: "Customers who find our waitresses rude ought to
see the manager."

A sign seen on a hand dryer in a Lesotho public toilet: "Risk of electric
shock-do not activate with wet hands."

In a Botswana jewellery shop: "Ears pierced while you wait."

On one of the buildings of a Sierra Leone hospital: Mental Health
Prevention Centre."
In a Maternity ward of a clinic in Tanzania: "No children allowed."

In a cemetery in Uganda: "Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from
any but their graves".

In a Malawi hotel: "It is forbidden to steal towels please. If you are not
a person to do such a thing, please don't read this notice."

A sign posted in an Algerian tourist camping park: "It is strictly
forbidden on our camping site that people of different sex, for instance a
man and a woman , live together in one tent unless they are married to each
other for that purpose."

In a Namibian nightclub: "Ladies are not allowed to have children in the
bar."

Nirgimo · (#27 (**permalink**))

Bin Laden,

Come to Frisco and you'll get used to that.

ojwang · (#28 (**permalink**))

>Signs of Africa
>In a restaurant in Zambia - "Open seven days a week and
>weekends."
>
>On the grounds of a private school in South Africa - "No
>trespassing
>without permission"
>
>On a window of a Nigerian shop: "Why go elsewhere to be
>cheated when you
>can come here?"
>
>On a poster in Ghana: "Are you an adult who cannot read? if
>so, we can
>help."
>
>In a hotel in Mozambique: "Visitors are expected to complain
>at the office
>between the hours of 9.00am and 11.00am daily."
>
>On a river in the Democratic Republic of Congo: "Take note:
>when this sign
>is submerged, the river is impassable."
>
>In a Zimbabwean resturant: "Customers who find our waitresses
>rude ought to
>see the manager."
>
>A sign seen on a hand dryer in a Lesotho public toilet: "Risk
>of electric
>shock-do not activate with wet hands."
>
>In a Botswana jewellery shop: "Ears pierced while you wait."
>
>On one of the buildings of a Sierra Leone hospital: Mental
>Health
>Prevention Centre."
>In a Maternity ward of a clinic in Tanzania: "No children
>allowed."
>
>In a cemetery in Uganda: "Persons are prohibited from picking
>flowers from
>any but their graves".
>
>In a Malawi hotel: "It is forbidden to steal towels please. If
>you are not
>a person to do such a thing, please don't read this notice."
>
>A sign posted in an Algerian tourist camping park: "It is
>strictly
>forbidden on our camping site that people of different sex,
>for instance a
>man and a woman , live together in one tent unless they are
>married to each
>other for that purpose."
>
>In a Namibian nightclub: "Ladies are not allowed to have
>children in the
>bar."

@coccus.
I got this message as a forward and immediately consigned it into the junkmail basket.

Hepcat · (#29 (**permalink**))

UGANDAN MAN

1st week: A lot of gifts showered on you
2nd week: If he manages to get the first one, a lot of it will follow soon (sex)!
3rd week: Not available
4th week: Was seen with another woman at the local joint doesn't give a damn if you are also there!

NIGERIAN MAN
1st week: A journey to a certain town but leaves you in the car
2nd week: Going together to the post office to fetch a parcel
3rd week: Caught in a road block with drugs and suspect parcel(s)
4th week: Jailed together

AMERICAN MAN
1st week: Takes you out to dinner
2nd week: Buys books to read & hire videos
3rd week: Misses his family
4th week: Goes back to America & will keep on sending email and cards (forever Amen)

ZIMBABWEAN MAN
1st week: Too much loving
2nd week: Marriage
3rd week: Permanent citizenship
4th week: His whole family moves in with you ,arriving one per week!

GHANAIAN MAN
1st week: Moves into your flat /house
2nd week: Brings friends into your flat
3rd week: Promises marriage
After 4yrs: Leaves the country to go back to his old wife

KENYAN MAN
1st week: Too much loving & caring
2nd week: Takes you to bed and insist you do it without a condom
3rd week: Always busy so HE will call only once
10 months: Doesn't wanna hear anything about the kid

GERMAN MAN
1st week: Takes you to the gym & zoo
2nd week: Takes you to the tatoo shop!
3rd week: Buys you dress rings for fingers and toes
4th week: Leaves the country to join the army

JAMAICAN MAN
1st week: Takes you to the reggae show
2nd week: Smokes Dagga until you get used to the smell
3rd week: Dreadlocks your hair
4th week: Talks about Bob Marley until YOU decide to leave him! ( )

SOUTH AFRICAN MAN
1st week: Too honest & loving
2nd week: Asks why not transfering "that" young sister of yours to an uptown school. She can't make it from a rural school you know!
3rd week: Caught raping a neighbourhood girl & disappears
8th month: Comes back with "lets forget the past" slogans until you agree!

-I hope you learn humility by being humiliated, and that you learn honesty by being cheated-

coccus · (#30 (**permalink**))

@ Ojwang

and....