DO I GO AHEAD AND DO IT ?

TINMAN · (#1 (**permalink**))

My chick and I have been together for 5 years now. We have one kid together and we live together. In the beginning of our relationship everything was all fine and dandy. she did everything for me. I never had to ask for anything twice. I fell in love with her and I vowed that she was "THE ONE". I gave up all of my female friends and just focused on us and the rest of our life. I loved her and wanted her to be my wife.

Well, after two years of bliss I found out that my chick was seeing my close friend behind my back. she was seeing him, and taking him around her friends, and taking him out like she just didn't care if I was to find out. This went on about 5 months behind my back. A freind of hers who is mentioned later on this told me everything that happened and I confronted my girlfriend and asked her about it and she said she doesn't want to talk about it and that she made a mistake and admitted to it while promising never to do that again. Being in love I took her back and she still does things like get guys' phone numbers and she still talks to other males. I feel so stupid for letting her do this to me.

Anyway, she has a friend who I am very, very attracted to. I fantasize about her all the time and what it would be like to have a fling with her. We flirt with each other on the side but it hasn't gone any further. I want it to go further so I can feel like I got my girlfriend back but I would rather my girlfriend didn't find out about it. I also think that if I messed around with her friend that something more might occur.

Am I wrong for wanting to do this? I love my chick but I can't get over what she did to me. Please let me know if I'm solving this the right way?

muombaji · (#2 (**permalink**))

tinman.......go for professional counselling ...ur r/ship seems to have issues...going out with another woman will just raise the tensions in it....thats my opinion...

after 2000 posts i will retire...http://www.website-designs.com/image...s/Mozbeach.gif

Pops · (#3 (**permalink**))

You'd be a fool to get involved with her friend. You guys have a child together and that's where your focus should be. Payback is a #####,that will lead your relationship to destruction. How about you guys getting married married instead of 'shacking up' together? I think this will overcome the insecurity issues you two seem to have. Marriage incalcates a sense of belonging that we all cherish.

Nirgimo · (#4 (**permalink**))

Been with her that long and you found out she cheated on you should tell you something. You guys were meant to be together for a certain time and it's over. It can be hard sometimes to accept that, but TWO WRONGS DON'T MAKE A RIGHT. Move on and forget about her. Someone should respect you enough not to do such a thing. Good luck though.

Siko · (#5 (**permalink**))

>How about you guys getting married
>married instead of 'shacking up'
>together? I think this will overcome the
>insecurity issues you two seem to have.
>Marriage incalcates a sense of belonging
>that we all cherish.
I am sorry Pops, but there seems to be a misconception here. Mariage doesn't change nothing, except you sign some sh!t aass papers. If there are insecurity issues before a marriage then it is time that the two of you went different ways. And is is unfair for a child to have to go through the parents being together and not loving each other and hooching all over the place!

mwatu · (#6 (**permalink**))

Oh the stuff that people put out in this web site - truely unbelievable.

Are you looking for some kind of justification to do an act that you know that is beyong all reason ? Your concience should do that pretty well.

Hopefully you will realize this and stop looking for justification for a crappy act.

Labell · (#7 (**permalink**))

>I love my chick but I can't get over what she did to me. Please let me know if I'm solving this the right way<
CORRECTION!LET'S CHANGE "I can't get over what she did to me" TO what she is doing to me/make the act present.AIN'T THAT WHAT YOU JUST WROTE?

GET THIS FROM ME,A FEMALE DOG WILL ALWAYS BE A FEMALE DOG-NOT TO SOUND RUDE.

Sweet9 · (#8 (**permalink**))

Last time I checked, two wrongs didn't make a right. Think rationally ma friend, just think...

Keeping it real ma peoples, keeping it real!

blackberry69 · (#9 (**permalink**))

Tinman, what i would advise is that you go for counselling coz hii ni kitu inakusumabua sana. Secondly talk to your woman. Be real with each other about what y'all want and need from each other. If she still wants to date other jamaas then I say let her go. You can only have a situation with two answers here. Its either you she wants or she wants to be elsewhere no two ways about it. Thirdly I dont see how sleeping with her friend will get back at her. This is something you and you alone will have to deal with for the rest of your life. All I can say is that make wise choices. choices that will not affect your little one that much and choices that will make you and your woman happy. Best of luck tinman

Vipiman · (#10 (**permalink**))

>Am I wrong for wanting to do this? I
>love my chick but I can't get over what
>she did to me. Please let me know if I'm
>solving this the right way?

Tinman
The time has come for you to part ways. With what you have just described you should have been long gone. There is nothing to think about here, except of course the baby, who i trust you will both take care of. But besides that I suggest its time to move one, this relationship has lost functionality, no trust, deceit, tit for tat drama in the works?
Hello! move on there is better out there..

yes walk away..

http://members.fortunecity.com/rovo/...s/walkbear.gif