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Mlevimmoja
 
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Default Why does commitment scare men? - 01-04-2002, 02:30 PM

Many Men get into relationships and rarely know what to expect as things progress. But if there's one thing women can be sure of, it's that we're likely to treat commitment with disdain. My Question is WHY do they fear commitement? And they won't agree to be played or double dealed just incase the other guy may be serious.

Is it true that What men fear most is seeing themselves with the same woman after 10 or 15 years where there are new NDOGO NDOGO all over the place?

Why do men fear commitment???????
 
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Default RE: Why does commitment scare men? - 01-04-2002, 03:30 PM

Women tend to be very forceful about issues concerning commitment. After dating a woman for around one year dont be surprised to hear her talk about how she plans your marriage. That ##### scares me right on my feet.... i thought we were having a great time, why change things.I assume its all about flexibility and the freedom to enjoy yourself without anyone getting on yah face......even after falling in love usually men maintain a strong bond with companions unlike women. Women tend to concentrate their energies on the guy and when the dude does not respond in the same magnitude ......he doesnt want any commitment.Men want to get committed but take it slow sistas......You just dont come in my sphere and demand all the attention regardless.
 
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Default RE: Why does commitment scare men? - 01-04-2002, 05:28 PM

Commitment is for marriage or rather for the one you are going to marry & the only reason I would get married is for the Kids(in like 50yrs)...that's it...
Why the heck would I want to tie my self down to one chick? Kwani mimi ni Pastor...life is so much better when you dance to the beat of your own drum...

 
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Default RE: Why does commitment scare men? - 01-04-2002, 05:34 PM

It scares women too...;-)
 
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Default RE: Why does commitment scare men? - 01-04-2002, 05:48 PM

Commitment is the fianl step, when a guy makes that decision he is saying adios to the single life he enjoyed so much and enter a new uncertain world. I'm not saying that is it bad, just new and most ppl are afraid/sceptical of new things
 
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Default RE: Why does commitment scare men? - 01-04-2002, 06:15 PM

It doesn't scare me I just think it's a waste of time. If I know right off you are not my soul mate even if you look like Alicia Keys and have Mother Theresa's heart why do I wanna get committed yet I know I'll never marry you?

In any case, at a certain age as a teacher of ours used to say, socialise but don't specialise until you are ready.

If I meet the right woman I won't even blink before getting into a commitment.

A pointer for ladies though. In conversations stick to the present. Like a wise dude here once said, being 5 years into a conversation when a guy is only 5 minutes into it doesn't cut it. Making assumptions that YOU are going to be together 5 years from now annoys a guy. Don't presume to say for a man where he will be or whom he will be with in the future.
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Default MEN...OPEN YOUR EYES - 01-04-2002, 06:37 PM

WITH THE EXCEPTION OF BROWN SUGAR, ALL THE RESPONSES ON THIS THREAD HAVE BEEN FROM MEN!!! (Assumption)...THE SADDEST THING IS THAT ALL THESE MEN HAVE RESPONDED ON THE BASIS OF SOME FALSE/MISTAKEN PREMISES.

1. The assumption that all women are looking for commitment. As brownsugar stated women are terrified of commitment too, especially if they are INDEPENDENT. An independent woman does not need a man to make her feel whole, and therefore is terrified of the idea of committing, lest the commitment turns into disaster.

2. Assumption that men do not want commitment(badly). I am sure that most sistas out there HAVE dated a man who was SCRAMBLING for committment. In fact I would argue that once men meet the "right woman" they are very pushy and forceful about getting commitment from the woman.These men just pretend to be "anti-commitment" around their buddies but when in the presence of the woman, the story generally changes.

Men are NOT scared of commitment. They simply pretend to be while in the presence of their comrades, so as to maintain the macho cool.


 
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Default RE: MEN...OPEN YOUR EYES - 01-04-2002, 06:57 PM

IB,

Understand one thing. The question was not the perception of men's aversion to commitment by their peers,

rather it was the perceived real fear of commitment that women see when they want a commitment from their men.

That is the question.

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Default RE: MEN...OPEN YOUR EYES - 01-04-2002, 07:06 PM

MTT....

It is not illogical for someone to argue against a question because they disagree with the very premise the question is based upon.


 
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Default RE: MEN...OPEN YOUR EYES - 01-04-2002, 07:14 PM

i think it's not fear of commitment but it's the thought of being torn btw'n parties

. .......just a thought (i stand being corrected if i'm wrong)
 
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