Divorce consciousness

[msema ukweli Kabisa]

Ephisians 5

25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to make her holy, cleansing[b] her by the washing with water through the word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30for we are members of his body. 31"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh."[c] 32This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Jerry D, if you are basing your arguement on the bible, It says a man should love his wife as their own body. Meaning what you cant do to harm yourself should be the same application when it comes to your wife

[Type R]

Originally Posted by Devine

I'm thinking of the Obama marriage. They clearly love and respect each other. With that foundation it is easy to submit to each other.

History is being re-written!!

Michelle thought that Barack was "selfish" to follow a political career. I think she thought it was an ego-trip, you-know, a black man climbing the political ladder in a white world.

Michelle would leave stik-it notes all over the house --- "put your socks in the laundry basket!!!" .... "barrrryy!!!! put the plate back in the sink when you're done eating..." -- I guess, since she was busy at work, it was here way of nagging in absentia.

Michelle could not understand why a Harvard-educated lawyer started off his career by become a social worker, "community organizer" -- just the same way that Sarah Palin made fun of him!!

I think, when it comes to relationships, we all have the same problems -- whether a poor fundi who lives in Kibera or a future political candidate. Some of us can get designer clothes and publicity professionals to make us look nice for the camera, others can't.

[Type R]

Originally Posted by Jerry D

Nay, it doesn't work like that.

Even though it doesn't work, I think many women want to test the waters. That is where the topic of this thread/linked article come into play.

People are living parallel lives:

* shared bank account + secret bank account
* mutual insurance + secret insurance
* hidden car log books
* hidden land purchases
* solid friendships of the opposite gender with/without sex just-in-case
* photocopies of titles of shared assets

These can be considered "business continuity plans"....

The problem I have with this kind of behaviour is that it tends to be self-fulfilling.

If a husband inadvertently finds out that his wife is a landlady in her own right, that she has purchased a piece of land without informing him -- that is, gone through all the hassle of finance, mortgages, salary deductions, lawyers, Min of Lands searches, etc, getting tenants, insurance, opening water/elec accounts, paying land rates, etc --- if she went through all that alone and came home every evening with a loving smile on her face, not telling him one single word, when he finds out, a deep sense of betrayal comes over him.

Would you blame the man for growing distant?

[Jerry D]

Originally Posted by msema ukweli Kabisa

Jerry D, if you are basing your arguement on the bible, It says a man should love his wife as their own body. Meaning what you cant do to harm yourself should be the same application when it comes to your wife

There is no definition of love that includes harming the loved.

[Jerry D]

Originally Posted by Type R

Would you blame the man for growing distant?

If these were done by the man to the wife ...lemmi think.

[al-zalzalah]

Originally Posted by KEMINOKANA

So when Alza says husband Y must be doing something right, she forgets that he does alot of things wrong too. In my view that's where people go wrong. Your husband must not have to do something right for you to respect him. Neither does your wife. Sometimes someone needs to be the light for the other.

Oh no. I didn't forget. That's why I said he had to have done something right. Not everything. Just something.

True respect is earned, my friend. Nobody in this world can be the light for the other forever. Inafika point ambapo they have to switch. And if the partner is not willing to do sthg right at that point, then the flame gets snuffed out....

[miss foxy]

I think the problem is simple....women are evolving faster than men and once u evolve u cant go back which is what men expect of women,for them to go back to the dark ages before we discovered fire.!the solution is simple,men need to catch up and adapt to the new woman,that way everyone is happy...

[Type R]

I have previously accused newspapers of plagiarizing Mashada and I make that accusation again. A few days after this thread, Standard today publishes an article called Women’s secret wealth.

It could be a coincidence, it could be.

It is the fear of this end that makes many women stash away cash and buy property in secret while still married.
.............
Escape plan

Many men see it as a selfish endeavour by women, feeling that wives drain their men through family expenditure, all the while salting away money for their rescue should the marriage boat sink.

The men are then left broke while the women enjoy their secret savings.

But women claim that their secret accounts and investments are justifiable.

[m kenya]

I havnt seen anywhere in the bible where Christ and the Church submit 2 one anatha. As someone has said people r having things in paralel 'just in case' bt it ends up being a self-fulfiling prophecy. When this building block of society has been sufficiently mutilated by camouflaged/fake relationships n 'anything' can go, from homosexuals 2 open marriages, when they wont be just 1 reference of how a functional home should be, and the standard 4 right n wrong are based on self, when people r unwiling 2 lay aside self-aggrandisment 4 the sake of family, the world will end and Christ will come back. Right now i say let every1 do what is pleasing 2 their eyes. Its not my work as a man 2 keep policing men n women who think empowerment is antagonistic to sanity. Do what you f*kng want! At the last day every1 wil b held responsible 4 their own lives!