I need HONEST guys' opinions

heshimu_wasichana · (#1 (**permalink**))

I'm 25 and currently seeing this guy who is 7yrs older than and I am so confused.
.....rewind
I stopped dating guys younger than 25 because I never found a guy that i have the same interest and also that is serious about realtionships so i thot that I should try older guys.

I have been with him for 13months, love him so much but scared to admit it to him because of fear of heartbreak. I do show him that I love him in many ways and he knows that. I am faithful to him and I really thought that THIS WAS IT, MY MR. RIGHT. lately I have seen change and my suspicions advanced when some gal called him to which he stated that it was a friend and nothing more. After I perisistently kept requesting about the gal, he said "I lOVE YOU BABES, BUT I NEED TIME"
what exactly does he mean?.

diezzle · (#2 (**permalink**))

it means it not good to ask grwn ups such kind of questions, stop being possesive, he is only a man.

Happyk · (#3 (**permalink**))

I cud be wrong. I think he is having an affair. You are too afraid to express yourself, express yourself fully and whoever loves you will appreciate you for who you really are. Dont be afraid to be single for it is better to be than to be used, ask me I know. Leave him before its too late, trust me.

Msoto · (#4 (**permalink**))

Both what diezzle and happyK say are kind of true. While you do not want to 'suffocate' him with 'what does this mean questions' you also want him to be aware of how you feel on this issue. There seems to be something that he is not comfortable with, if however you find no way to activate your lines of communication. Then it maybe best to move on.

I would suggest...make him a sumptous meal one time.....his favorite dish....set the table...and let him eat until he has his fill. If he asks you about your day and everything...just smile....and then when he is done...bring up the topic of....so...whats going on about this and that. Hopefully you will be able to communicate on where you stand relationship wise....dont ask too many questions at once...ask and pause for an answer.......patiently you can end up finding out what you need to know.

You have been together for 13months it wouldn't be wise to rush into making any decision just based on assumptions.

sikigi · (#5 (**permalink**))

Hey i think this means that he knows that you are in the sack and he wants a new catch knowing you will be ignorant to ask questions. Pack n leave the dude.:7 Cheerz

Nattyjonah · (#6 (**permalink**))

Just going through your opinion quest and thought that you ought to hold on .He girl i've never met you bot i know you are beautiful.If you let go now how many other times are you going to be giving up just coz you've heard s'thing that you think might drop it all down?You made a right decission to make a turn and be with an older guy.So i guess you can still hold on as i know,turning back and wishing you were "7"years younger can't realy help much.Good luck.Don't give Him the exccuse to lel go.Coz who knows,he might be the God chosen love for you.

general_b · (#7 (**permalink**))

After I perisistently kept requesting about the gal, he said "I lOVE YOU BABES, BUT I NEED TIME"

the guy is a player. Tell him to hit the road (period)
then move on, no second thoughts...
it will be hard doing that, but you will heal after sometime,trust me on that
oh ho, I forgot!
and make sure he knows he is the one who tripped so you get to be the leaver and not the left...

ppirres · (#8 (**permalink**))

You are in a game called a relationship which has never been a game of roses.
I see that you are not mature enough for an 'older jamaa' -he will lie, cheat and may even be married. What the hell who said roses don't harbour thorns?

go back to younger jamaas until you become mature enuff to handle the game. this is also reflected i the fact that you have generalised and put aside younger jamaas cos of age. maturity is what counts in a relationship...and cheating is part of it because u r not married yet.
it is only in a marriage situtation that u would not expect cheating...but it still happens. the guy knows he can have u and someone else becos u r not mature enuff to know.

Settle for less now (younger jamaas) until you get wiser. Only then can you move.

simple-n-clear · (#9 (**permalink**))

I'm not a guy but i'm a chic who recently went through something similar and my question to you is, so he needs time that's great at the very least we all see that he can identify what his problem is with some allowance for grey areas which you are now supposed to fill in the blanks for yourself (or atleast that's what he's hoping you will do) but how long are we talking about, and what are you supposed to be doing while he's "taking his time"? If you answers are not pleasing to you BOUNCE ON THE MAN, HE'S NOTHING BUT A JOKER, He's got jokes for days and unfortunately you will not be part of the group enjoying the joke coz the joke will be on you.

This is my philosophy, if a guy likes you, he will pursue you and not come up with ridiculous excuses such as i need time. If a guy is confusing you and when you ask him for clarification he give's you such a shady reply there is a reason and the reason is not positive leave him with his confusion and go find a man who cant stand to confuse you coz he's so crazy about you!

Men are not complicated we (women) are the ones that complicate them in our heads hoping if we complicate their responses to us they will somehow match the profile of the man we wish they were!

wanaume · (#10 (**permalink**))

Oh my lord thats the big one, once you give him tyme, there will be no talking, so when you are not talking, when will you know that he wants to start talking? And how will it go? you know are you going to start afresh or fro where you left. You know what once someone tells you that they need tyme, (regardless of wheather it is a guy or not) it usually means that its over.