[Tactician]

My friend has approached me to lend him some money. He is in a tricky position so he could do with some help.

On the other hand, my experience with lending him money is advising me against it.

What's your experience with lending money to friends?

Does it spoil friendships?

[sdolphin]

Only lend what you can afford to lose.
Think of it as a gift so if they pay you back, well and good.
If they don't, you haven't gone without to help them.

[Buster-]

Originally Posted by sdolphin

Only lend what you can afford to lose.
Think of it as a gift so if they pay you back, well and good.
If they don't, you haven't gone without to help them.

Pesa + Friend = bad equation

[Tactician]

Originally Posted by sdolphin

Only lend what you can afford to lose.
Think of it as a gift so if they pay you back, well and good.
If they don't, you haven't gone without to help them.

If i do not help him, he may get thrown out of his apartment.

On the other hand, i need the cash in the next month hence it's money i cannot afford to lose....

he wants me to lend him, sorts out his issue and then he pays me back b4 my commitments check in.

but i'm scared that if i lend him, i will be at his mercy....as in i will have to rely on him to repay me or i will be in the doghouse maself.....

and from my experience with him in the past, he does not repay - severally he has caused me financial troubles i waited for him to repay me...

i just dunno what to do...in that i cant let him be thrown out...and i dont quite beleive he will repay me when i need the cash....

how do i tell him kindly that i can't manage?

[bfbs]

Originally Posted by Tactician

If i do not help him, he may get thrown out of his apartment.

On the other hand, i need the cash in the next month hence it's money i cannot afford to lose....

he wants me to lend him, sorts out his issue and then he pays me back b4 my commitments check in.

but i'm scared that if i lend him, i will be at his mercy....as in i will have to rely on him to repay me or i will be in the doghouse maself.....

and from my experience with him in the past, he does not repay - severally he has caused me financial troubles i waited for him to repay me...

i just dunno what to do...in that i cant let him be thrown out...and i dont quite beleive he will repay me when i need the cash....

how do i tell him kindly that i can't manage?

Don't give him money, let them throw him out of the apartments then shelter him till he get his money.
One thing you must learn with money is to stay hard or else they won't stay with you.

[sdolphin]

Like Buster- said the two don't mix.

Just tell him you don't trust him cos of previous behaviour. He cultivated it, your just reacting to it. Sometimes you have to be tough especially with friends and there's no way of sugarcoating this.

He's broken your trust several times. Why should this time be any different?

Alternatively mwambie pia wewe hauna pesa or you're behind with some of your payments. Its not like he's going to be asking to see your bank statement as proof.

[jogich]

dude with the way things are going here...clone urself...say u are a beautiful gal and actually enda kwa facebook n put on a pretty face..start looking for dates and pple to mpesa u...with that u will manage to get the money...cheers.

[carolecarole]

the way we all speak here in mashada is like we never borrow money at one tyme in our lives.
a true friend yu will help.
n good thing is if yu lend them n they never return,
then good riddance,
they cannot come back for more.

[sdolphin]

Originally Posted by carolecarole

the way we all speak here in mashada is like we never borrow money at one tyme in our lives.
a true friend yu will help.
n good thing is if yu lend them n they never return,
then good riddance,
they cannot come back for more.

And like Tac said he's had problems with him before.

[Tactician]

Originally Posted by carolecarole

the way we all speak here in mashada is like we never borrow money at one tyme in our lives.
a true friend yu will help.
n good thing is if yu lend them n they never return,
then good riddance,
they cannot come back for more.

I have lent him cash before and he caused me problems...not once, more like twice or thrice....

and as we speak now, he already owes me cash from the last two months and he has not mentioned a word about repaying it....

sasa am like, yes he is ma friend, but at least he should say how he is going to repay the cash he owes me first before borrowing more....these cash i have lent him i have already written it off in my mind cos i can see he has no intention of paying back...but i have not told him about this write off cos he told me he would repay me....so am waiting to see what happens

methinks he is used to me being his door mat...he is kinda loud and aggressive while am laid back...so i usually accede to what he wants....but now am thinking he wants to use me