[reggae analyst]

paudah,lucky u went to private.

see when we went to school,it was a hustle in its self.imagine it was a nightmare to get commuting.them matatus did not carry kids.alafu watoi were forced to stand near the loud ass engine them old ass bus called daf a.k.a nyayo bus or some ol school k.b.s which looked like mkate ya elliots (blue bird).

we had this walalo family composed of like 8 kids.we used to tease them that whenever they were together,they looked liked stair steps coz all were 1 yr apart.infact we nick named them primary maths because if u remember,the text book had 8 stair steps and kids stepping on the,

anyway abdi was the most cunning in that family.during lunch time,their mother used to bring them lucnh in 3 big ass kasuku 2 kg conatiners,mostly the food was spagetti or some walalo stuff called anjera.

that abdi was bitten by matatu bug.that was the time the manyangas and manoris coach ruled.he used to wake up very early in the morning,put long pants in the bag,and wear uniform pretending he is heading to school.he would head to a bush near chuo,change and then go to the stage where he begun his moring shift as a makanga.he would appear at around 12.45 eat lunch with his siblings and then disappear till 4 pm when he put on his uniform and head home.he was cunning that atimes he be in chuofeign he has a tooth ache and when he was given permission to go home,he would be seen pushing a matatu stuck in mud near our school.

anyway flash forward 8 yrs,i was surprised to enter a mathree and see him seated upfront.he proudly told me he is the c-owner of the best mathree in #9.

thats when i realized u don have to go to school to be succesful.while some of us were busy learning the g-clef and f-cleff,abdi was raking in $$$.see the thing is to know your strong areas and maximize in the potential

[Coach]

LOL reggea analyst.

Paudah,
Man I can't remember the last time I heard the word 'chuvyu'. We were a bit worse and used copper cables from old phone lines to hit people with, paper wasn't an option.

Life was good in primo; sometiems we used to go to City Park usually in a group. One time we took this dude from 'ocha' to 'mtego' (it's a labyrinth that takes skill and lots of experience to get out of). We took this dude and ran away, leaving him behind, in the middle of 'mtego'. He was running around like a lunatic for a good half an hour and then he sat down and started sobbing. We came and helped him out later and that was something to laugh about for a week.

Another time at City Park (which had lots of monkeys too), we were having lunch and with us was a guy from Western province (new in school) that day. He was eating 'half-bread na soda' when suddenly a monkey came and stole his drink, run up with it to the trees. He started shouting 'sota (soda) yangu, sota yangu'. We had laughing fits hearing him shout like that.


Primo was also the time we learned about 'kuchoma shada'. One dodgy dude (probably in jail or dead today) used to know all the 'peddies' in the neighbourhood. He would buy a lot of 'shada' and supply the whole class. Everyone had to try it! Imagine when the teacher comes after lunch and tries to teach, the whole class is bursting out in laughter. The teacher is trying to teach us maths but the whole class is high as a hell.

[reggae analyst]

manze pia life ya primo ilikuwa survival for the fittest.imagine carrying a big ass bag full of kedo 10 text books and 12 kasuku kitabu excersie books each kedo 200 pages na kando yake u have an encyclopidia by malkiat singh.that was torture.and then the teachers expected u to have the books on opening days all of them books covered.woe unto u if u don have the books.u will get a hiney beating and send home to get the books

anyway,in our primo,we had a chap named moses.see moses was a proffesional kauzi in the making.that jamma started with pencil,then went to fountain pains..them days if u had a hero ink pen which coated 120 bob,u was a celeb.if u had a parker pen,u a baller.anyway moses had a habit of reaping where he did not sow.that meant u better be careful when u see him.

anyway,moses was in std 7 and had graduated into stealing books.he had a contract with some jammas who sell used text books in eastland.moses was to supply books and get 50% commison after sales.
so we had this jamma named samuel.he had all the books required but the irony was that he always was last and he never made an effort to chop cz the had money.

moses arranged to steal all the books.all the books had a street value of 2000 bob.so moses waited till all of us had gone for break and he took off with sam's book bag.he gave it to his crew who was waiting at the fence,and off they went with the loot. after break,sam was shocked to see his book bag gone.a search was conducted but nothing was found.all this time people suspected moses but he said he had an albi that he was in the loos when the theif struck.


comming up---how moses was caught and can't beleive what happned to him before the k.c.p.e

[African teacher]

Maze primo pia ilikuwa na vituko zake.Mnakumbuka ma kausha?(all those stuff that used to cushion our asses wakati wa kuvunjwa.Iam aware of jamaaz who had shonelea tandarua kwa kinyasa(short) za shule bana juu mboko za dhafu?aiiih,wacha tu.One day the whole thing backfired daro na wasee wote ilibidi wavunje the second time.It was this boy called Hendrix.Tulikuwa tunarevise zonal mock dhafu,na wasee walikuwa wamenyesha.Ikafika time yake ya kuvunjwa, maze sauti kaa ya kuchapa plywood ikatoka,ni kaa modes alikuwa akiseti cardboard.maze modes kumshika rasa, boy alikuwa ameweka box ya bata ndani?modes akamshow aitoe daro lakini, mbele ya mamanzi?no way!.alienda toi akatoa.Kurudi, maze maboiz tulivunjwa ungedhani modes alikuwa akiuwa nyoka.Anyway it was fun jo!

IF YOU CANT STAND FOR SOMETHING, YOU WILL FALL FOR ANYTHING!

[tysh]

>manze semeni wathii
>
>yenyewe when i was in primo life was good and bad.let me start
>with the good times.
>
>our school was located in one of the notorious parts of
>mtaani.imagine at times it was usual to see a jamaa murdered
>or see a foetus (sp) being flocked with inzi etc near the
>bush.anyway those exeperiences were hard but there was this
>old mzee who had a habit of showing his mboko (read penis) to
>chiles of our primo.
>
>he used to live in the bush and was more like a cave
>man.thanks to him,we used to fika chuo mapema coz that jerk
>would chase you and your chick for 1 mile and u be surprised
>that u could show carl lewis vumbi.
>
>anyway as fate would have it,makudinyo was his name died in
>mysterious ways and that made many stude late for classes but
>most importantly,there was no one who would harras youwhen u
>trying to hanya.
>
>the good part of being in primo was that there was this thing
>called P.T.A money which was like 300 shillings per term.them
>days it was alot of money.anyway we used to look forward to
>the day when the head of p.t.a would chase us.we used to call
>him "CHAIRMAN".the worst part is when your parents pay and u
>have to remain in chuo while 3/4 of the school goes home.
>
>well since i joined std 1,my pero decided that i use my cuzo
>family name so we can share the coast sababu they were many
>kedo 5 and they had established their name huko.many of my
>cuzo went thru the same chuo.anyway the bad part of it was
>that the teachers used to make fun of us ati tuko wengi chuo
>and atimes i used to feel embarrased.
>
>but it was all good when mr chairman used to chase us to go
>get the p.t.a money.cheers to you but manze mlimanga pesa
>zetu.u lied to us that u will make a swimming pool put 10 yrs
>later,we still waiting.
>
>but for substitute we used to go to a place called fishing and
>another "water slide" made of old sewage pipes called ******
>mtelezo,i wonder who came with that name
>
>
>may be my kids will see the swimmo only time will tell
>


reggea analyst............you sound like you were in the same primo as me or in the same area as the primo i attended. eastlands wapi? sema jina!





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[mguumoja]

>>>but there was this old mzee who had a habit of showing his
>mboko (read penis) to chiles of our primo.<<
>
>READ ~: JAKROTHII!
>
I remember seeing rothi, what really happpened to him, i also remember seeing a foetus at the market dust bin one time, i hated some teachers in my primo days, kanyoigua she had a pipe that she inserted a stick, she was a real sadist, githiomi damn, she always picked on me, she taught swa, dem shrubs bana.

[SirViKtor]

there`s this time in high school our princi Otula after bossman the previous princi was transferred was making a speech during the assembly about hygiene and Otula made an off the cuff comment that we ought to have hankies and its a boys school so everyone bursts out laughing and the 4th formers dissed him as in like cheering in "aaaaahhhhh silly" so the guy gets so mad he ordered mass panos and the 4th formers who dissed him collared

[reggae analyst]

life in the primo was also hard and bullying was rampant.remember them days people used to argue who is the first body 2nd body 3rd body etc mbaka last body.if u don know what they mean, 1st body meant that the jamma can kick ass of anyone in school/class.it was a honour many people coveted.even the ladies had their own versions and 1st body alwyas had all the ladies

anyway there was this neighbouring school(a gumbaro) which always kicked our ass.that chuo had thousand uniform i.e students used to wear whatever they felt like to schoolmanze that chuo had big boys some kedo 6'4 and should have cleared form 4 but they always seem to rewind in std 7 and 8.we used to call some of them fathe and baba coz they had beard more than the teachers. most of them students used to live in the ghettos of ziwani,mathare,majei a.k.a majengo and some as far as mukuru kayaba.

parents in our school were worried coz students used to arrive home late.this was because most of the students had to wait till the gumbaro students had left so as not to encounter them.

we had this chap named odongo who used to live far in ongata rongai and he used to take 2 buses.he came up with an idea of how to hide his money from them bullies.what he would do is he would open a hem in the shirt,hide his fare and sew the shirt back.so one day he was handwad by the bullies,when they discovered he had like 50 shillings for fare,they were happy to relieve him his fare.

so odongo was left there crying contempleting on what to do.should he walk all the way to ongata rongai?should he beg?go tell the teachers?report to the police?what was he to do?





they had like a union

[reggae analyst]

well back to the saga of odongo.
now it was getting late and the jamaa had no bus fare since some jerks from the gumbaro school had decided they had plots for odongo's fare. well i had fikad home and was relaxing with my 4 0'clock mug of uji before i embark on my homework.see them days my peros had a strict time table no going to play foota,1 touch etc untill u finish homu.woe unto ou if the mzee comes home and found u not done with the assignment.

anyway back to odongo.while still sipping my sugarless uji,i heard a knock on the door and guess who was there,odongo.he looked like he had been to kosovo.clothes were torn and all muddy.he was crying and saying things to the effect that his world had come to end since his pero was gonna whop his hiney for not getting home in time,blah blah.

since i did not have any chapa,i suggested that he chill with me and enjoy uji till my pero arrive home from work.when my mzee came,we explained the issue and he suggested that we alert odongo's pero that their kid was o.k not to worry.since it was late,he was to spend the night in our crib.

so the next morning,we went to chuo and was welcomed by odongo's mum by the gate.all the teachers had by then known bout the incident.odongo was excused from chuo and off he left with his mum to nurse his wounds.

anyway we planned on how to revenge the incident during break time but thats another saga.

life in primo rocked sana although we had it rough

[reggae analyst]

its about time.forgot about maisha ya primo.the saga continues.will be back with details