Wakamba ! -
10-07-2002, 12:34 PM
A Kao is buying a TV.
> "Do you have color TVs?"
> "Sure."
> "Give me a green one, please."
>
> ******
>
> A Kao calls KQ "How long does it take to fly to Machakos?"
> "Just a second," says the rep.
> "Thank you,"says the Kao and cuts the line.
>
> ******
>
> A Kao was filling up an application form for a job. He filled the
> columns titled NAME, AGE, ADDRESS etc.
> Then he came to the column Salary Expected:
> After much thought he wrote : Yes!
>
> ******
>
> A Kao proposes to a woman.
> She says, "Yes, if you'll bring me a pair of crocodile boots."
> He sets off to Maasai Mara and disappears.
> Finally a search team finds him hunting a huge crocodile.
> He walks over to the reptile, checks its legs and angrily exclaims, "The
> 70th damn croc and this bugger is also barefeet!"
>
> ******
>
> A Kao goes into a store and sees a shiny object.
> He asks the clerk, "What is that shiny object?"
> The clerk replies, "That is a thermos."
> The Kao then asks, "What does it do?"
> The clerk responds, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold."
> The Kao says, "I'll take one!"
> The next day, he walks into the office with his new thermos.
> His boss asks, "Wow, you have a Thermos! What do you have in it?"
> The Kao replies, "Two cups of coffee and a Coke."
>
> *******
>
> A Kao went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain.
> "I would like to buy this small TV," he told the salesman.
> "Sorry, we don't sell it to Kaos," he replied.
> The Kao hurried home removed his beard and changed his hair style, then
> came back and again told the salesman. "I would like to buy this TV."
> "Sorry, we don't sell to Kaos," Salesman replied.
> "Damn, he still can recognize me," he thought.
> He went for a complete disguise this time, haircut and new hair color,
> new outfit, big sunglasses, then waited a few days before he again
> approached the salesman.
> "I would like to buy this TV."
> "Sorry, we don't sell to Kaos," he replied.
> Frustrated, he exclaimed "How do you know I'm a Kao?"
> "Because that's a microwave," the salesman replied.
>
> ******
>
> Why did 18 Kaos go to a movie?
> Because below 18 was not allowed.
>
> ******
>
> The doctor told the Kao to run eight kilometers a day for 300 days TO
> LOSE WEIGHT..
> After 300 days, the Kao called the doctor to report he had lost the
> weight, but he had a problem: "I'm 2400 kms away from home."
>
> ******
>
> A Kao's two sons Kilonzo and Muoki are waiting at the train station for
> a train to Machakos.
> A train comes and as the other passengers are boading, Kilonzo asks the
> clerk: "Can I take this train to Machakos?"
> "No," answers the Railway man.
> "Then Can I ?"asks Muoki.
>
> ******
>
> Having lost his donkey a Kao, got down to his knees and started thanking
> God.
> A passerby saw him and asked, "Your donkey is missing; why are you
> thanking God?"
> The Kao replied "I am thanking him for that I wasn't riding the donkey
> at that time, otherwise I would have been missing too."
>
> ******
>
> A Kao got the 4th child. He fills data in the birth certificate
> Mother: Kenyan.
> Father: Kenyan.
> Kid: Chinese.
> "How come you wrote "Chinese" when both parents are Kenyan?" asks the
> registrar.
> The Kao says, "Ahhh... I read in the newspaper, that every 4th person
> born on Earth now is a Chinese."
>
> ******
>
> Two dogs, Dip ##### and Spider, and a Kao were sent to the outer space.
> The ground control issues commands, "Dip #####!"
> "Woof!" Dip ##### barks.
> "Press the red button."
> "Woof! Woof!"
> "Spider!"
> "Woof!"
> "Press the white button."
> "Woof! Woof!"
> "The Kao!"
> "Woof."
> "Stop barking, feed the dogs and don't touch anything!"
>
> ******
>
> A Kao, Muoki, and a friend, Pakoris, went to South B. They managed to
> get into a double-decker bus. Pakoris somehow managed to find a seat
> downstairs, but unfortunately Muoki got pushed to the top.
> After a while, when the rush was over, Pakoris went upstairs to see his>
> friend Muoki. He met Muoki in a bad condition clutching the seats in
> front with both hands and saying his prayers, scared to death.
> He asks,"Oi Mkamba! What the heck's goin'on? Why are you so scared?... I
> was really enjoying my ride down there?"
> Muoki mumbles, "Yeah, but you've got a driver."
>
> ******
>
> A Kao, with two red ears, went to his doctor.
> The doctor asked him what had happened to his ears and he answered, "I
> was ironing a shirt and the phone rang - but instead of picking up the
> phone, I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear."
> "Oh Dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But ..what happened to
> your other ear?"
> "The scoundrel called back."
>
> ******
>
> A Hawaiian and a Kamba from Kenya were asked to form a sentence with the
> words: Green,Pink and Yellow.
> The Hawaiian wrote:
> Every morning I put on my Pink shirt, light up my Green cigarette and
> look at the Yellow sun.
> The Kamba wrote:
> Every time I hear the phone ring, "Green! Green!", I pink it up and say,
> "Yellow! Yellow!"
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