Quote:
Originally Posted by carolecarole
Lakini i think most men like to dog.
i know of 4 very innocent men.(so their mamaaz think)
who got issues with gals.
sasa what makes me wonder is...if these harmless men I know still do stuff.
Which man doesn't?
Mind yu hawa ni wasee wa JC front seat church n marriage n relationship counsellors kwa kanisa.
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Reminds me of a little incident I had last week. We were 3 ladies having some girl talk one afternoon. One of the ladies goes on and on about her friends husband and how nice he is. She goes on to praise him until my other pal and I feel like we really want to meet this angel of a man. As fate would have it she mentioned where he works which happens to be the place I used to work before I moved to my current place. With that I was curious and asked for his name, what department he worked etc. Lady was so sure I wouldn’t know him so she told me. Surprise surpise I almost choked on my tea, what a small world we live in! The alleged Mr nice, Mr perfect, Mr faithful, Mr would-never-even-look-at-another-woman happened to be the same man who flirted with me day in day out. The man would even come to my department just to stare at me. The whole office would have a hearty laugh because he never hid that fact. He was such a clown and he did it all in good humor. When he came he would have every one know he has just come to ‘have his morning ray of sunshine’ after which we would go on and on to flirt. It was harmless flirting, I never let anything happen beyond that. Mind you at that time he was still married to the same lady and every one knew it.
What am I driving at? Men are by nature visual. They will not fail to appreciate beauty in a woman simply because they are happily married. When I say beauty I don’t just mean physical beauty, but also inner beauty. Appreciating beauty by looking, and maybe flirting doesn’t amount to cheating. I mean really!!!!
Its his nature. Unless a wife is very insecure this shouldn’t be an issue of concern to her. The man is married to her not the woman in the street or in the office or where ever. He comes home to you every night doesn’t he?? So be easy.
Another thing, men are by nature polygamous. He may love his wife with everything he’s got but still have this need to ‘conquer’ a ‘new young thing’ thing. What I know is that its not in the affair per se but in the man. His need to feel he has still got it???
Or something like that. He never does this to hurt his wife infact if anything he will never let her find out unless there are deeper issues in that marriage.
That said and done, I want to mention that it is possible for a man to have feeling for multiple women. Note that these are distinct feelings…not that he feels the same for them all. His wife however will be waaaaaay up on a high pedestal. No other woman can reach her level. After all this is the one he decided to marry, to be the mother of her children, to go home to every night etc. The other women play a special yet important role in his life. Who knows, they are probably what the doctor prescribed fro his marriage. These other women may not just be ‘accomplishments/trophies’ for the man’s ego but they could be playing a vital role in his life. His well being and his marriages’ survival.
Every situation is different and should be looked at on a case to case basis. We can’t judge them all ‘kiwhole sale’. Some we may never even understand whats going on or why the man does what he is doing. What you need to do carolecarole is walk into that marriage or relationship realistically. Men will not always be dogs but they will always be men. Don’t expect an angel. The men we call dogs are ….well lets just say they are in a class of their own. Or they are undergoing midlife crisis, adolescence or some **** like that. Tends to mess around with the screws in their head…. I mean how do you sleep with 3 women in a day in the same bed????(
ok story for another day)