[beste]

You surely need prayer. Of course God is there. The bible does not tell us we shall have paradise on earth, but it assures us that though we move through difficult situations, God is there with us. You must have courage to face the current life on earth. God told Moses "do not fear, for I will be with you." He said similarly to Joshua, "have courage". In the epistles the Lord forewarns us of difficult times to come, not for the non-christians or christians. He only talks of difficult times.
I wish to encourage you to still read the bible without the desire to have it please you but with the absolute believe and realisation that;
God is there
God loves you, he gave his only son so that if you accept him you be saved. Please accept him unconditionally.
God at times allows his people to go through difficult times in preparation for times of refreshing. His timing is not our timing. He allowed the Israelites to suffer in Egypt for 400 years, yet he had promised their father, Abraham, that his offspring will be blessed!

I undertake to pray with you now. Please read the bible daily unconditionally and prayerfully and God will reveal himself to you.
God bless you mightily.
Beste.