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]]>How can the Kenyan prez and/or PM make more than the prez/PM of countries far more prosperous?
kibz makes more than Obama. The USA has an economy at least 800x larger than Kenya’s!
raila makes more than Gordon Brown. The UK’s economy is at least 100x larger than Kenya’s!
And then they go to BEG for food aid!!! If I were a donor, I would say go to hell for more aid. You draw obscene salaries & are bloody corrupt. Let your people starve coz then they may see the need to change the government!
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| Written by Steve Mbogo (Business Daily) |
| April 10, 2008: My comments in RED New rules meant to guide the operation of venture capital firms have introduced high taxation and restrictions on investments that players say may threaten the sector’s survival. The rules are meant to regulate the venture capitalists — who take stakes in start ups and midsized firms and exit as the businesses near maturity — who have shown unprecedented interest in the Kenyan market over the last two years. The sector is now raising a red flag over a taxation regime that it says makes resident venture capital funds uncompetitive at the global level. This has seen some firms opt for other countries like Mauritius where the taxation is more favourable. I have blogged how Mauritius is diversifying its economy using brains... while Kenya... oh, well... Administration costs are also high as venture capitalists will now be required to have a contracted fund manager to oversee and allocate the investments of the venture capitalist. How does a small VC fund - managing KShs 100mn - afford a Fund Manager? Many VC funds start off much smaller. Peter Njoka, a partner at Aureos Kenya Managers which manages a venture capital company known as Acacia Fund, said such a manager is paid a management fee plus value added tax (VAT), yet the funds do not have any “vatable” services to sell. “The fund absorbs all the VAT of 16 per cent which eats into its resources and increases the cost of doing business here,” said Mr Njoka. He however said the new rules would help the industry grow to international standards faster. The industry might die or is left to the big boys. Warren Buffet does say that if he was born anywhere but the USA at the time he was born... he might have not been as successful! I can guarantee he would not have succeeded in Kenya with its arcane laws, corrupt judicial system, corrupt & incompetent politicians, the selfish NSE & incompetent CMA! The new Registered Venture Capital Companies Regulations (2007) define the principal objective of venture funds as provision of risk capital to small and medium size businesses in Kenya. The regulations however give venture funds flexibility in determining the kind of companies they invest in. They require the fund to have a minimum paid up share capital of Sh100 million shillings and proven history in operating such a fund. How the hell does a newly established fund have an operating history? The problem is the CMA is full of 'career civil servants' who do nothing better than do nothing! Get serious... Unless you invite foreign VCs how do yo expand the industry since there are only (officially) 9 VC funds. So this means no new local VC funds? Daniel Muchika of InvesteQ Capital says the regulations automatically lock out start up venture capital funds by demanding that eligible applicants produce audited statements for at least three years. Go figure... Are these guys born as idiots or did they learn to be idiots? For a venture capital fund to be registered, it must present the CMA with its preferred mode of divestiture from eligible venture capital enterprises, including details of risk factors that are specific to the chosen investment sectors, or sectors intended to be invested in. The company must also present a bank reference from a commercial bank. Erm, so if a VC fund is putting its own money into the ventures i.e. not borrowing... why do they need a bank reference? If the bank is lending to the VC then let the bank do its own due diligence! The regulations restrict venture capital funds from trading in real property; banking and financial services; and retail and wholesale trading services as their primary businesses. What is this idiocy? Why not let the VC funds do what they like! They are in business to make money! Real property could benefit from VC funds! “This means that venture funds have narrower options of investments. It means that venture funds have to scout for ideas that promise quite high return on investments, usually of at least 25 per cent per annum to compensate for this,” said Mr Muchika. So the CMA is raising the cost to the investees. An investee needs to provide 25% p.a. return to get funds from a VC fund. Let the VC fund decide what they want to make. Open the market to VC funds! Currently, there are nine private equity funds operating in the market, five with a combined capital base of over Sh4.9 billion have targeted SMEs in East Africa. But a 10th fund known as East Africa Development Bank Venture Capital Fund worth Sh2.6 billion will make an entry into the local market later this year. Others include Business Partners International Limited (BPI) launched in February last year, Grofin East Africa launched in mid-2005, Acumen Fund, InvesteQ Capital Limited and African Agricultural Capital that focuses on agriculture related businesses. The funds should also preserve transaction records for at least seven years and to verify the sources of their funds as well as investments to ensure they are not used as a conduit for funds sourced from criminal activities including money laundering and corruption. In this respect the regulations are seen as porous. |
| The Chief Justice Wednesday urged a construction firm to speed up the new Malindi court project saying the delay was denying people justice. Mr Evan Gicheru said the Sh285 million project was behind schedule and should be ready by July. He said the completion of the new court premises countrywide would bring justice closer to the people. “We want to arrive at an ultimate level where the furthest court of law from any Kenyan is four kilometres,” he said. The CJ addressed a staff meeting at the Malindi old court chambers before visiting the multi-million new court site with the resident magistrate Mr Joshua Kiarie. On the Lamu court that was scheduled to end several years ago, Mr Gicheru said there were no funds to complete it. The CJ also urged Kenyans to resolve disputes through the courts instead of using street demonstrations or violence. “My message to Kenyans is this... Don’t use machetes. Use the legal system, which is efficient and reliable,” he said. WTF...? Lest I get sued... I shall keep quiet. Or is it that I am at a loss for words? Or is it that I can feel the bile rising? Please let me know what you think... |
By Brian Adero
The Common Market for Eastern and Southern Africa (Comesa) secretariat has threatened legal action against Egypt over claims that it was unfairly subsidising its industries.
Secretary General, Mr Erastus Mwencha, says if accusations made by Kenyan industries are true, his office would take stern measures.
"We will act on the evidence brought," he said. "The issue of Egypt and the subsidy in today’s global talk are the core issues which need to be talked about. Comesa will take action against any member state found to be going against laid down rules. Under the World Trade Organisation, Kenya is at liberty to institute legal action in the event that there is proper evidence on the subsidies," he said.
He was responding to allegations by a director of Synresins Limited, Mr David Hutchison that Egypt was giving subsidies to a tune of $6 million a year to the energy sector to keep down costs of doing business.
Hutchison called upon the Comesa secretariat to put a tax on goods originating from Egypt.
"This issue of Egypt must be tackled by the Kenyan Government. The effect is gradually being felt by all industries in Kenya," he said.
"We have evidence to show that the Egyptian Government is subsidizing its energy and fuel sector by a factor of seven. Whilst kerosene is Sh55 per a litre in Nairobi, it is only the equivalent of Sh7 in Egypt."
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By Beauttah Omanga
Cabinet minister Mr Simeon Nyachae has flown to London for medical check-up.
A family member said the Roads minister left at the weekend, accompanied by close family members, for a routine check-up for injuries he sustained three years ago while exercising at his Nairobi home. When reached for comments by The Standard, the minister’s personal assistant, Mr Charles Birundu, confirmed the reports but did not divulge further information.
Nyachae was early this year quoted as saying that his doctors would determine his life in active politics. "I will go back to London in September for a final health checkup.
On whether I will be seeking to defend my Nyaribari Chache seat this year, depends on my doctors’ advice," he told a rally in Kisii last month.
One of the leading politicians in Nyanza Province, Nyachae is touted as a key player in President’s Kibaki re-election bid.
Already, there is anxiety among his supporters over his medical status.
"It is our prayer that Mzee is given a clean bill of health," said Kitutu Chache MP, Mr Jimmy Angwenyi.
]]>| Cash payment to Francis Thuo investors explained | | |
| Written by Geoffery Irungu |
 Photo by: Frederick Onyango The Nairobi Stock Exchange blamed logistical issues for decisions to compensate investors of the collapsed Francis Thuo brokerage firm in cash rather than the equivalent value in shares.30-August-2007: The Nairobi Stock Exchange yesterday blamed logistic difficulties for its decisions to compensate investors of the collapsed Francis Thuo and Partners Stockbrokers in cash rather than the equivalent value in shares. Oh, please educate us... What were these "logistic difficulties"? During a meeting with majority investors whose business was transacted through the collapsed firm, the NSE was put on the spot over how it picked on a day when the market was generally down as the value date for the compensation. The meeting, which took place on Tuesday, saw the NSE admit that fraud was apparent in some cases where shares were sold by the firm without valid orders from investors. If there was fraud why have no arrests or prosecutions taken place? Why are the crooks being protected? Who is shielding these crooks? The criteria used to pay investors in cash at face value — with no interest or regard to the losses made during the seven months that the firm has been in business — had raised eyebrows soon after NSE announced August 17 as the value date. The value date, if any, should be the date Francis Thuo & Partners shut down. Mr Chris Mwebesa, the NSE Chief Executive, said the date was picked upon because that is the day when Renaissance Capital —which bought the Francis Thuo business for Sh251 million —paid their dues. Well, since the NSE/CMA waited till it received KShs 251mn from the sale of the license then it reasons that the customers/creditors should receive a share of the EXCESS funds!!! Basically, the creditors "own" a company in bankruptcy. So the license (& monies from its disposal belong to the creditors!!!). It was also the date the cheques were being written after the reconciliation of accounts relating to the investors through the insolvent broker. He said 850 investors were involved and the payments were going on as scheduled from Monday and are set to be completed by this Friday. Misunderstandings had arisen mainly because there were investors whose shares were sold by the collapsed firm without them having given sale orders. There is no misunderstanding. I call it FRAUD. Simple as that! If I had shares held there simply because I need a CDS account does not mean I wanted to sell the shares. Replace the shares for shares! The NSE boss said it would have been logistically difficult to start buying the shares again on behalf of the investors. Nonsense! The NSE should give the customers/investors the option of receiving cash or shares. The NSE has a process of "buying-in" shares if not delivered by brokers. The NSE can buy these shares from the market & transfer them to the investors. Mr Chandulal Shah, an investor at the NSE and also a consultant on investment matters, said that investors should have received shares instead of cash in cases where such shares had been ordered and paid for by the broker. Damn straight! Mr. Shah is an experienced shareholder activist & is RIGHT!!! Mr Shah said that those who had sold the shares of investors without their prior approval should be charged in court with fraud. I see the hand of FT & Partners' friends in this matter!!! Some members of the NSE are protecting one of their own including a silly suggestion that FT gets a "golden handshake" for committing fraud... WTF? This may set a precedent where a thief caught in the act gets compensated for his "troubles" coz he was caught stealing! WTF (again)! Although the money owed to investors was initially thought to be around Sh90 million it has since turned out that it is about Sh150 million. Mr Mwebesa said the bourse also has to compensate the investors for dividends and bonuses that had been dispatched to them through the stock broker. Of course, investors should be compensated for bonuses & dividends!!! In fact, investors should demand interest on the cash & dividends!!! The claims paid for included money that had been in the accounts of the investors, funds received from the sale of shares without authority and for shares sold but for which money had not been received by investors. What about interest on the money? And at T-Bill rates!!! Mr Mwebesa said those who had ordered for shares with the brokers but which had not been bought would receive the exact amount of cash they had given the broker. What about interest on the money? And at T-Bill rates!!! Controversy had arisen as to the criteria used to determine the August 17 as the date of reference when compensating investors as the stock market 20-share index had on that date lost nearly 70 points compared to the previous week, depicting a less attractive week to invest in the bourse. Mr Mwebesa said the NSE had during the meeting asked investors to bear with them especially in view of the fact that the bourse had done everything possible to ensure that they did not lose any money. Oh, please! What did the NSE do to protect the investors? The NSE was aware of the bounced cheques from FT & Co. The NSE knew that investors were not getting paid for shares sold! The NSE abetted the fraud. As is the investors should have been compensated for the losses through fraud but neither the NSE nor CMA raised a finger to help them during the tough times! The NSE had the option to repay the claims of the investors through raising funds from their members but they did not! He said that investors would ordinarily have been entitled to Sh50,000 maximum if the money had to be drawn from NSE’s Investor Compensation Fund. “The payments to investors are expected to maintain confidence in the stock market,” he said. So the NSE is saying that to protect oneself against FRAUD, an investor should have no more than 50,000/- in a broker's account? How can I have confidence in such a scenario? I have a good mind to recommend ALL investors should hold certificates!!! The SIPC in the USA insures investors for a minimum of $500,000 (KShs 33,000,000). Finally... where is the CMA in all this???? |
Me and my Chap! OVER. Finished. Finito.
So anyway, I came home from a trip…….I have been up and about, losing stuff, travelling, then my sister was ill for a while in hospital and her hubby was away so I moved into hers to be around my nephew whose idea of dinner is cereal, sprite and playstation. Special.
Straight on to the vanity then.
Anyway, I came back from a trip and the chap picks me up and we went straight to the club where his friend was having a party.
34 years old….bleuurghhh, fossils all of you. Fekking pensioners, check into an old people’s home.
Anyway, my feet really swell when I travel, so I am always in sandals. (ughhh, pan to the head, why now)? And I was in slacks. Ughness. You will know in a minute why I mention this.
I hasten to add, that my hair was bogus. Bogus. That’s all you need to know.
So, we get to the club, halafu, midway, this mama shows up. No names, but she is a famous Kenyan, hot like whuot and all that…smh, I only see her in the papers. So, ala! She is hugging my chap and going “ uhhhh, its great to see you, how have you been….you look good bla”. The usual you know.
A little later the chap introduced me to her like “This is my girlfriend KM’ Tihi. She was nice you know, but in retrospect I remember the look she gave me. Like a “now you which garden did they dig you from and which cat dragged you in here?”
My god! Physically, the woman be flawless!! Makeup and weave in place, nails, skin, hair…halafu she had time to go dress up so I mean, she beat me to all vanities like heels and nice clothes and bag. Which sucks! I overhauled my wardrobe only a month ago, so I have cool things to wear dammit!
I shoulda gone home and powdered my stupid nose angalau!!!
Anyway, around ish Friday, I remembered and asked the chap “Oh, BTW, how do you know (hot mama herein known as heffer)”.
Soooo,, very nonchalantly, chap goes eti…erm, “we had a thing like 4 years ago”. Whuoooooooot? Auuuuiiii, a certain pain seared through my body and I felt my self combust.
Whaaaat? A thing? WTF is a thing!?
Look, I know stuff about my chap that erm, I have had strangers walk to me and tell me. "Oh, that chap in a bad boy!".....then, "that chap is pussy whipped". How special. What can I say, Erm, rest assured I will not be asking you to dry my tears when he breaks my *whimper* fragile little heart. I have dated bad boys all my life. Why stop now? There is the thrill of 'breaking' them and of course, if they screw you over before you do *drat! don't you hate it when that happens!*, then tough luck, kwani what are the girls for?
So me, aiii, ninyamaze nife….I started prying. “why did you break up?” “who dumped who?” LOL, you have to forgive me, at the mention of ‘thing’, I left my pride at the door.
So, the chap looks at me like he so knows he just opened a pandoras box.
Tihii no lies, but in my head, images those fekking red carpet and how beautiful people attract each other to propagate beautiful offspring and ensure continuity…killing me. Chap goes eti…..mwehehe “we were not clicking”. Let me ask...is that what they train you in 'how to effin trick your woman school?'
I throw him a that does not qualify as an answer look, so, Smh, I never said he is not smooth, he pulls me to his lap and goes eti ‘It was not even a relationship. We hang out for about 2 months” Ermmm, 2 months, Good ‘un. Feeble consolation there!? As in like that is a short time? What U be smoking chap?
Haiya, so me, I pried…and pried, and the chap was giving me politically correct answers Lol, like “we could not connect intellectually”, the chemistry was off” Rubbish! Rubbish!
So, I decided, ah, wtf, KM, go on, ask. So I asked *yes, I know, Hangs head in absolute shame* If erm, he told her he loves her or they had nicknames for each other. Weeeeeeaaaaaakkk!! I know!
Mwehehehehe, because he is special like that, he said eti “KM it was 2 bloody months! I don’t even know her middle name”. LoL. Dead horse. Sasa now what does a midlle name have to do with it?
Oh Lwad! I tortured myself you know? I bet he used to wear his thick black sweater..luuuuush, and she her perfect clothes, and they would walk holding hands and kissing kissing, and and *sniff*, I bet he would put his arms around her and go “ this is my girlfriend” , then they would make each other laugh in their perfect little world, and she knew which deo he uses and his favorite food*dies* Halafu, I bet her pancakes were ready in the middle and he did not have to come help her mix the batter. *scratches head, takes a swig of muratina*. I wonder if he would suck her toes and and touch her oh-so-perfect face kila saa. Ugh!
You know how you meet people your chap dated and you look and go “feh! She has nuthin on me that”. I bet that’s what the heffer thought. OF ME.
Anyway, so I was retrospecting on things, like when I tell the chap he looks good and he pinches my cheek and goes “you are not too bad yourself pumpkin”…..I know why. Not too bad. That’s what I am. Not too bad. Like I have seen better kind of 'not bad'
Or, when he says “hi beautiful”, in his head it goes, ‘hi beautiful………..NOOOT” Think Borat. Vagine hanging like sleeve of a wizard. Lol, specialness that Borat.
Or “KM you are 1 million women rolled into one” Rubbbish! All of it Rubbish!!
In short, really, my self confidence has shot to absolute shiet.
I know, I know, I mean, I have so much more going for me….NOOOT, but for once I’m like how now?
Tyra Banks to Lucy Kibaki, LOL, how now? Kwani you have a deathwish?
So anyway, a while later I got ejected from his lap and he went like “Si even you you dated the chap who used to (insert shit-pales-in-comparison-activity like being the behind the scenes intern in Dunia wiki Hii). Weaaaaak! and yes, yes, I know the people at Dunia wiki Hii are human...just saying.
“I can’t believe you are actually reacting to something that happened almost half a decade ago” I was 29, what did I know about women?” Good ‘un. I’ll tell you what you knew….did it have to be her!!! HER!!!!?
So, I called my friend and told her you know, that stuff, and she laughed like this loud looooong laugh and went “ngai Kamum! What’s he doing with you?”
Great. Just effin great!!
I also ranted and raved to others until I got a “I have met her. She’s a tad ovverated”. Lol, A tad. There's another good 'un.
Bless.
Contary to what this post will have you thinking, I’m not one to be bothered by looks, *sniggers* I would not say I look like an absolute shoe you know, but put me next to the heffer and intense, very intense surgery is my only way out. Plus, dare I mention the limb elongation vile I’m like 3 inches tall. Fekking midget.
Anyway, after thinking about it, Saturday Night when my baby left for a trip, I filed for a breakup…via text.
I hear its bad manners but argh, who will explain again now. Then I switched off my phone and got a “Quit playing KM” voice mail.
I know, I am overreacting but *shrugs*, mwehehe, we all have skeletons in our closet…tihiii, my chap has heffer.
Halafu do you think it helps that my face has freckles from zits I irritated like last year, ok, week, year, who the fuck’s counting!!!. Mwehe, disaster is what.
I refuse to date a chap who dated that woman. Vain? Kwani is this that village thing where eti the chap marries the fuglee cos she has a nice heart? Rubbish! Halafu that being with somenone because they have a great personality is bull right now since some chap I used to see erm, attacked my personality. He had the nerve to accuse me of **rolls eyes** “you played me and you were very good at it” There’s another one full of rubbish! Whuot? Wow! For a minute there I had forgotten the pain I felt when he twisted the serrated knife he had firmly lodged in my back. Ngutness me!
His nerve leaves me stupefied to date. What can I say? Its like those pickpockets who steal your bag, theeen start screaming thief. AT YOU. Before you know it, you are a tyre rim and you are being doused in paraffin for your final destination. Special.
So Smh, si now I have taken the walking papers. I thought I found perfection until I discovered what it dated! Wacha tu! Sniff. I will;
-Enroll to extreme makeover
-Practise posing for the camera…Lol, weaaaaak!!!
-Up heels to 7 oinches or see about limb elongation
- Get weave/wig *dies* Auuuuuiii, me in a weave. Nice. The damn guy cannot even stand weaves, well, he went livid when I took out my locs ala!…wtf! Well, that’s what they all say until the weave comes on Tyra or Shakira or Beyonce or (insert preference)!!!
So today erm, I * hides face* I googled her. Yes, I did. Then I started googling her with variations including my chap, you know like “heffer chap relationship” or “heffer chap in love” and in an insane moment "heffer broke up chap" Nuthin!!
Pathetic innit? I know. Here I cannot be helped. Go on, save yourselves. Let me stew in this misery.
Shame, I so dig him. Shame, I he does me too.