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stranded in me

• August 10, 2007
• A tribute to Monica Nyagichuhi 1982-1998

  Posted: August 10th, 2007, 7:18am CDT

  she's my beautiful 16 year old sister now deceased. 9 years ago just before midnight chuhi as we called her woke me up complaining of nausea, after alot of pestering i woke up, she was throwing up and being the genius i am i gave her milk coz she had ulcers. when i saw her condition was getting worse i ran to the neighbors for assistance we took her to hospital where the doctor refused to see her until i paid a consultation fee which i did, when finally he agreed to see her. he asked me "unaniitia nini hii ni maiti" "what are you calling me for this is a corpse!! util recently i hated doctors and out of principal i'll never date those heartless monsters although i know not all of them are. thats how one of the most friendly, vibrant, sometimes extremely annoying ever smiling, with a deep throaty laugh and beloved sister left this world.
  to date i haven't come to terms with the fact that ill never see her again. its a terrible way to live, the pain is as present now as it was then. God rest her soul.
  mom says i should let her go so she can rest in peace. i try, maybe i should try harder. its hard to let go of unconditional love. i know it was God's will but it still hurts like hell.
  she would always try to say hello in a sweet girlish voice but coz she had a husky voice, she'd never complete the hello. she unlike all of us knew how to spend wisely even at her young age, at 16 she was having sex and had a long term boyfriend, she was in 2nd form and an average student, she loved designing clothes from an early age, we'd always talk about how she'd be making all my clothes. i was always over protective of her. one day we were in town for a day out she was pressed to go to the toilet and i kept telling her to hold it until she pissed on herself..chuhi please forgive me for that. we both loved madonna and we'd play and dance to her music all the time. i miss her dearly, i love you kid sis...