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intricately me
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2:29
From: intricately me
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3:06
From: intricately me
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Did i mention how much i love this show...I think you should watch it. Take a minute out of your busy schedule and have a giggle...or rather roll on the floor laughing
http://www.thedailyshow.com/
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1:51
From: intricately me
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20:26
From: intricately me
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Now its final, i am actually leaving the States and going back home. So i thought i would share some of the places i have been. I'm going to start with Oakland because i lived here for a year before i moved to New York and i am back here now. Thats actually quite the cliche. Oakland is 15 minutes east from San Francisco... Its a lovely town, spanning across 78 miles or so, Oakland is one of the oldest towns in the states. Its known for its particularly good weather, i beg to differ though because having come from Africa nothing beats our weather but Oakland seems to have a balance, its not too hot in the summer and not too cold in the winter as compared to other states. They have a little gentrification project, the mayor is trying to get more people to move to Oakland and since Oakland has one of the higher crime rates in the country, he has been trying to do this by tearing down bad neighborhoods and building condos in their place. I dont agree with that approach either, because now where do the poor people go? The Zoo... The San Francisco zoo is better though but this one is nice too...  Jack London Square... This is in downtown Oakland... Absolutely lovely...  The skyline at night, i love that tribune building it light Oakland up...  The lake... we walk around this lake all winter trying to look really hot in the summer....  The movie theater... I know it looks old and it is, It dates back to 1926, its one of the oldest building in Oakland, Its very well preserved and the screens are fine. If you ever move to Oakland, these guys have $6 matinée movies on Sunday...  The lake again...   Thats the court house...Many buildings in Oakland date back to the 1900's thats what gives it its charm....   I like this picture...I love the Oakland Skyline   This is a the beginning of a series... I'm going to do another post on San Francisco and then one with both... I intend to do a compilation of my favorite places from restaurants to stores to just ...places...If you have any ideas or pictures please let me know... And if there is anything you think i could do to improve this blog just drop me a comment or an email...
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20:48
From: intricately me
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This is for the next generation of afropolitans: My two cents
The grass is always greener on the other side...this is a statement that we often take for granted but how true it is. Everything abroad looks so inviting when your in Africa. It seems like they are eating better food, going to better schools...they even look like they have better friends. Its all perception really, its definitely not what it seems. Opportunity exists, it does, but only for the smart immigrant. Do not think you can just go to the embassy, get a visitors visa, get on a plane and figure it out when you get here. Thats what i did and it does not work trust me. If you actually really want to come and enjoy the bounty of endless opportunity, take some time to plan the whole thing. The worst thing you could do is rush into it and then realize that you didn't plan well enough.
1. Get a work visa or a student visa depending on what exactly you want to do. If the company you work for has offices abroad, ask them to sponsor you... if not ask a company abroad to sponsor you. Please stress on the fact that your an immigrant and they will get all the necessary paperwork taken care of. Alot of companies actually want to send people abroad because they need to be 'equal opportunity employers' and that means that they look better if they have a few skilled immigrants in their task force. You need to be qualified though so line up those degrees, once you get to the states you can probably ask them to sponsor your school and you can go on to get your masters, if this works for you do not waste the opportunity. Its easy to get sidetracked but if you are a little patient, it all pays off in the end. If you want to get a student visa apply to a school and once you are accepted, if you can pay for your first few semesters or if you can get someone to sponsor you, schools are often happy to accommodate you [thats because your paying international fees which are much higher than regular fees] If and when you get a job, No matter how menial or degrading you may think it is, hold on to it for dear life because that is your meal ticket. Do everything to keep it and be patient eventually things always get better.
2. Make sure you have savings, and a good friend, and a fall back plan[preferably a good job] and youre family behind you because its always difficult in the beginning. You dont need one of the things i mentioned... you need all of them. I cant stress enough the importance of friends who have lived abroad for a while because not only will they help you go forward they will teach you how to navigate the system. The 'system' is not something us Africans are actually used to and more often than not, we think that we dont need to be part of it. No you have to be part of it so you need some really intelligent people who are youre really good friends to help you. This help will prove to be more beneficial than money or anything else for that matter. Dont take that 'intelligent' thing for granted either because alot of people out here still havent learnt how to navigate that system, so you could get pulled in to the wrong crowd and it would take you years to figure out where you went wrong. You need to catch on quick, you need to soak everything up. Africans abroad are often heartless they will take advantage of you and tear you apart in an instant, when this happens, and i can almost bet it will, you need your family and the fallback plan.
3. Be curious....ask questions.... In school we used to say 'kuuliza si ujinga' im not sure if this is actually slang or not but its true... be friendly and ask questions. Its a bit overwhelming in the beginning because you try talking to people and you think they think your accent is weird but you would be surprised how accustomed people are to it and anyway after a while they begin to understand you anyway so don't be afraid to ask your question twice or thrice and don't be scared to be laughed at. There is nothing wrong with asking a question that makes you look like your dumb, remember you are just different not stupid. The more questions you ask- the more you know- the sooner you know more- the better off you are. I have moved from state to state, different states have different ways of saying the same thing, people really dont mind it when you ask them about it. It gives them a chance to explain their loyalties. Its almost like asking a Kenyan to teach you a few words in Swahili, we are always more than eager to share. Remember this, tell people your foreign and ask questions, they will be more than willing to help.
4. Do what you came here to do... There is alot to see and alot to do but dont get sidetracked. Come, get a driving license, get an ID, get into school, get a job, get a car, get your own place to stay, start saving and then you can party all you like. Do not spend money on partying. I cannot justify spending money on partying and i have been out here almost two and a half years! Dont do it, its really not that serious. People will take advantage of you if you spend money on them in the club and when your broke they wont remember that you spent money on them at all. This place can be very cruel and lonely. If you keep your eye on the goal and you stay focused it will pay off in the end... but you dont want to see the bad side so stick to what your plan was and you wont ever have to. Im not saying dont go...just dont go and pay for it. Alot of people fail out here and misery loves company, dont fall for any of it. I have spent a good part of my two years out here having fun and i really don't have much to show for it apart from the occasional really bad hangover, but it could have been worse. I have a friend who calls the states ' a concrete jungle' i believe thats from a Bob Marley song but its true. You could go out and your drink could be drugged by your 'friends', this has happened to me on more than one occasion so i urge you to be careful. You could go to the wrong places and get shot, i have been at a club where the actually pulled out guns and started shooting. You could hang out with the wrong crowd, get really drunk, and drive yourself home only to be stopped by the police... that means a DWI [driving while intoxicated] which is a misdemeanor that means for the next year you will be paying for lawyers legal fees and court fines, these usually add up to about 12,000 dollars and alot of time spent on running around trying to find the right lawyer and so on. Thats probably the most expensive drink you will ever have not to mention that it will be on your 'record' and whenever you apply for a job it will show up and make any employer think twice about hiring you. Its funny how very few people mention these things when you get here, People will casually ask you to drive and you will think nothing of it until your sitting behind bars with nobody to bail you out.
5. Do not keep to your own, seriously, make friends with people from where you are going. More often than not they end up saving you in some way or other. I have a few friends out here who have been there for me more than any Kenyan has. I can tell you from experience that your own people probably sold their souls a long long time ago when this country showed them its cruel side, and they really don't mind watching you suffer. Its almost like monolisation, they want you to go through it.... its initiation into westernization and you don't deserve it, so make a few friends... white friends preferably [and i swear that was not a racist slur] I have this friend who has supported me through everything, without her many of the questions i had would not have been answered. I am friendly however so its helped alot, I got my first job through a friend of a friend of a friend so as i said it all boils down to how many friends you have and how much they support you. I also have my 'big bro' and without him none of this would be possible at all. Be at peace with everyone you meet because you might meet the same people down the line and you might need them. Dont burn bridges and of course do not come thinking everybody is bad there are exceptions to the rule.
6. Don't get into a relationship, don't do long distance, don't have casual encounters, don't... Somehow all of that boils down to money or severe emotional distress, so give it some time.... Focus on your goal. I'm dead serious, Focus, because any kind of relationship takes time out of your busy schedule and money out of your pocket and if you dont have either that makes you miserable...so be miserable, find a few friends that you can hang out with once in a while and just be miserable...lol eventually when everything you have been working so hard for comes to fruition you will be happy you waited. Be prepared to be very lonely because its very different out here. Be prepared to be shunned, ignored, stepped on... they told me i would get culture shock, i didnt really, i had moral shock instead, i couldnt understand how people could be so immoral and how nobody held themselves accountable...i wondered for a long time how a society could be so 'mannerless' [thats for lack of a better word but i believe its apt] i mean this literally, i think talking right, using youre knife and fork, being courteous, saying please and thank you; these things were all left in the 'dark ages' or at least thats how it seems when you get out here. Its not like what you see on 'TV'. What you see on 'TV' is actually, more often than not, considered 'ghetto'. There are exceptions to the rule but most of it is ghetto.
7. Get online. There is an answer to everything online. Immigration issues, school issues, work issues, maps, banks, everything is here. I dont know how i would have survived in the states without GOOGLE. Im serious. Anything you don't know you can google and if all else fails ask me :) Get online preferably before you get to the states and look up everything you need to know. If you are coming to the states ask your fellow bloggers questions. No question is too dumb and trust me alot of people dont want you to suffer like they have.
8. Buy everything on sale...everybody else does...and if they don't they are very dumb. Don't buy anything at full price....I came to this country with about $5000 in savings. That lasted less than three months...between the designer jeans, shoes, accessories e.t.c...I spent it all. You can get everything cheap don't go crazy and don't be ashamed to be 'seen' buying cheap stuff, first of all nobody is watching you and even if they are they probably will never see you again...my motto is 'as long as it looks good get it' ....I bought a pair of jeans for 400 dollars.... i don't even like telling this story... i somehow forgot that that translated to 28,000 kshs... Hindsight is an exact science but please try and avoid doing this. Buy expensive food though, buy organic. Cheap out here when it comes to food is not better. I know it can be overwhelming to go to the store and actually choose...so many labels! but try. I actually believe that it helps not only nourish your body but your mind too. When you eat right you think better. Exercise is important too... Jog a little it helps clear your mind.
9. Avoid stuff thats fake, don't get involved in any schemes that don't seem right. Go online if it sounds tricky and ask questions. When i got here i used yahoo questions alot. I asked about anything and everything. I have seen alot of people get deported because they involved themselves in fraudulent schemes and i know many more who will. Its usually your friends who come to you and whisper about some brilliant scheme to make money, don't fall for it... if they are actually your friends they wont turn their backs on you when you show your disinterest. I have taught myself not to starve at someone else's expense, i have also learnt how not to get into trouble. Stay away from drugs and people who do them, because if you are caught in a car with someone who has drugs, more often then not they will claim those drugs were yours and just like the DWI thing i mentioned earlier its not easy to get yourself up after that.
10. People overlook Social Security and Credit. Take your time to understand these. Credit is very important, good credit is almost a currency in itself. You need to build your credit and eventually it will allow you to get everything you need. With a clean record [no arrests] and good credit, the opportunities in this country are endless. Do not overlook your taxes either. Do everything by the book. this is not Africa 'deals' wont help you here but if you do everything by the book you can eventually get anything you want from good loans, a big house to nice cars and great investments. This is why, if you are planning to come and live in the states, you SHOULD NOT come on a visitors visa....Because you will not get a social security card so you will not be able to build your credit or get a job or go to school or get an apartment or anything. I have been here two years and the best i could get is a shared apartment, i cant buy a car or go to school or get a job but i have two or three good friends and they have been there for me thats why i emphasize on friendship so much.
I have been reading this book by Dave Eggers, its called 'What is the What' He says something in the beginning of the book that i hold as true, he says 'I am tired of this country. I am thankful for it, yes, I have cherished many aspects of it for the three years i have been here, but i am tired of the promises. I came here, four thousand of us came here, contemplating and expecting quiet. Peace and college and safety. We expected a land without war and, i suppose, a land without misery. We were giddy and impatient. We wanted it all immediately-homes,families, college, the ability to send money home, advanced degrees, and finally some influence. But for most of us, the slowness of our transition-after five years i still don't have the necessary credits to apply for a four year college-has wrought chaos. We waited ten years in Kakuma and i suppose we did not want to start all over here. We wanted the next step, and quickly. But this has not happened not in most cases, and in the interim, we have found ways to spend the time. I have held too many menial jobs, and currently work at the front desk of a health club, on the earliest possible shift, checking in members and explaining the club's benefits to prospective members. This is not glamorous, but it represents a level of stability unknown to some. Too many have fallen, too many feel they have failed. The pressure upon us, the promises we cannot keep with ourselves-these things make monsters of too many of us.' This is by far one of the most well written books i have seen in the last few years... I believe however that the lesson is clear. Get a hold of this book if you can and read about a fellow immigrant, Also get 'the infidel' By Ayaan Hirsi Ali. These books have little nuances here and there that can help you understand what exactly you are getting into.
Alot of people will tell you be patient and swallow your pride and do whatever it takes to survive. I have lived here and i have been patient and i have done whatever it took to survive, but i will never sell my soul for a dream that wasn't mine initially [the American Dream]. I have not done anything that i did not want to do. Do what you think is right. Always remember to be true to yourself. You really don't have to stoop as low as they tell you to....you do have to stoop but to wherever you are comfortable. Before you come here you need to know what it is you want and how far you would go to get it. Stay out of trouble. I have a friend who i argue with constantly, his argument is the reason most foreigners fail when they come to this country is that they never fully commit to being here. At the back of their minds they are still convinced that they can always go back. I agree with him. If you fully commit to being here and you give yourself no choice but to succeed you will succeed. My argument however, is that if its not working after a few years of trying and if its not getting better don't be afraid to leave, don't wait until its too late. More that anything be analytical and logical don't let your emotions influence your decisions.Those are my two cents...Good luck and God speed!!
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18:37
From: intricately me
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Eight Things for Which I Have a Passion Pool Reading Non Profits People music Partying Travelling Children Eight Things I’d Like to do Before I Die Travel round the world Get a PHD in something weird Make all of my friends really happy Have a few more babies and fall desperately in love and live hapilly ever after Help some people somewhere get what they always wanted Create a legacy that my children can carry on. Discover an alternative source of energy [Thats the money ticket right there] Go bunje jumping - sky diving -be part of some covert undercover cia type operation doing something top secret very hush hush. Eight Things I Say a Lot Dundahead Its not my fault Like Kwani I will call you back You jua, you know [i say both] Gosh Eight/Ten Paper Back and Audio Books I Have Read/Heard Recently What is the what by Dave Eggers im reading this right now actually Infidel by Ayaan Hirsi Ali Cuba by dean Koontz Kiffe Kiffe tomorrow by Faiza Guene Half of a yellow sun by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie Brother im dying by Edwidge Danticat The google book by google Playing for Pizza By John Grisham These are what i could get from the top of my head there are many more. I almost went crazy when i saw the New York library, its huge and it has every book you could ever want. Eight Movies I Have Seen Eight Times Matrix...Not by choice everyone seems to have this damn movie Forrest gump... lol im not sure why Pretty woman... havent we all 40 year old virgin the gods must be crazy terminator sounds of music.... i used the songs as lulabies for my son Mary Poppins Three people who should do this AcoMwangiChurch mouse
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17:44
From: intricately me
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Its sad to see the stuff thats happening in Iowa i saw the images on CNN last night and i was absolutely amazed at how many buildings were underwater after such little time... The articles on it dont pay much attention to the devastation, and i think its a little deplorable that after such a huge disaster people still went ransacking houses and looting and so on. One would thing that something like this would bring people together. I saw another article that was talking about the financial implications of the flood. Iowa is know for corn and so grocery prices will probably go up, now with oil prices sky rocketing and corn prices going up its hard to tell where the world is headed. I was talking to a friend of min the other day and he was talking about how the world economy seems to be changing. I do believe that but i don't think its possible to forecast what its changing into. In this day and age with the evolution of technology, the constantly changing climate, expanding economies and the adverse effects of globalisation such as rising gas prices and so on. Its hard to tell what is going to change to what. There are many variables and i think that if it were a puzzle it would probably have many missing pieces. I had a chance to go visit New Orleans recently and i remember noticing how, as great as the city was, there seemed to be a cloud of sadness hanging over peoples heads. as i talked to the locals i couldn't help but wonder what it must have been like before. New Orleans is still a great place at least the people are really nice so i can only imagine.... Iowa seems like Katrina revisited only i hope this time these people actually get to rebuild their city, i hope emergency relief actually kicks in.[I don't know if anyone remembers the FEMA saga] All my sympathy goes out to these people may they find the courage to get them through these trying times. Again i was only taking a second out of my day to vent.. Au Revoir!
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10:25
From: intricately me
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I hate it when we make CNN's headlines because most of the time its not good news. So guess how i felt waking up to headlines like 'deadly hunt for 'witches' haunts Kenya'.or 'mob b burns to death 11 witches wizards'Now i know we strongly believe in witchcraft and all but can you imagine how dumb we look in the worlds eyes when we say things like "These people identified who is to be killed by accusing their victims of bewitching their sons and daughters." or "It is very painful when somebody kills another person in the name of witchcraft," he says. "Why couldn't they come to me so that I can perform my herbal potion to identify the real witch so that I can go ahead now to trap him and then we can see what to do?" seriously? Maybe its just me but i want us to be in the headlines because we found an alternative to Oil... i want us to be in there for a good reason not because of witchcraft!!
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1:27
From: intricately me
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Why dont i ever get tagged for interesting stuff instead i get this... 1. Numbers: i like this show because of the concept behind it. to think that anything can be calculated is extremely fascinating to me. Life is not supposed to be calculable but according to this show everything is a math equation. Hmmmm... i like it anyway. 2. House: I love house. He is such an arrogant, pompous, annoying jerk and yet he is still a hero. A hero we would love to hate but he is still a brilliant surgeon and you cant help to love how hard he tries and succeeds. 3. Law and Order: I know i know...its pretty dumb to like law and order, but if you ever lived in New York you would realize that law and order is a wealth of information in a sense. You end up knowing where not to go and what stuff means... I know thats vague but hey. 4. CSI: I liked CSI but i don't really watch it anymore... it gets old after you watch all episodes of all three of them and then watch the repeats.... No fun. 5. Nip Tuck: To be honest i have only watched a few episodes of this but the first time i watched it i couldn't believe they would air something that racy on national television... Hey hey for free speech... and freedom the American dream. 6.All the Late night shows, the Jon stewart show, the view, the soup: i love these things i don't know why but i do. Perhaps its that wit or that dumbness... i dont actually watch them that often though. 7.Yes dear, one on one, three and a half men, my wife and kids:Again the reason i have so many in one is because i hardly ever watch them so... 8. Wow was so hard pressed to fill this list. Apparently i don't watch that much tv. Does basketball and football count? Maybe Aco or Mwangi do...?
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1:17
From: intricately me
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This guy has me in fits every time i watch him... take a look... I love the wit... Tell me he isn't hilarious.
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13:32
From: intricately me
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I am so happy i don't drive... gas is at $4.50 and going up. THAT IS CRAZY! the implications of this are far reaching... Crime rates will definitly go up people will start using the public transportation more, so that means more spending on the governments part to upgrade transport systems because people will begin to notice the discrepancies with the public transport system. Thats more tax payer dollars right there. I saw this clip on the news on truck drivers spending at least $1000 to fill tanks everyday and i was stunned! thats alot of money. It costs $600 to leave the truck in a parking lot and $1000 to keep it running. Hmmm choices choices...
Anyway i wanna be the guy who finds an alternative to Gas because that would make me the guy who rakes in the millions. Thats where the money is at, in alternative sources of energy.I don't think the implications of the gas crisis has really dawned on people but i know i would be panicking and i wish i had the alternative...I heard somewhere that canada has huge crude oil reserves... I wonder why America hasnt taken advantage? Maybe i should move to Canada...or anywhere that has huge oil reserves lol
was just taking a minute out of my day to blog... lol ciao
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16:50
From: intricately me
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New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg, in a commencement address
http://www.philly.com/inquirer/opinion/20080521_demand_true_change_from_presidential_candidates.html
to University of Pennsylvania graduates, argued "For America,
the key to innovation boils down to one word. The key to
innovation is immigration. Our nation's greatest historic
strength is that we've always welcomed the best and brightest
from every corner of the globe. And yet every year, Congress
shuts the door to hundreds of thousands of doctors, scientists,
engineers and artists from around the world who want to work
here. It's the greatest case of national self-sabotage and
attempted suicide I can imagine. If our country's future is going
to be as great as our past, we have to start realizing that
immigrants have always been - and always will be - one of our
greatest economic and cultural assets."
hmmm thoughts?
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15:57
From: intricately me
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I am looking forward to this...Its going to be on the 18th of may... Anyone interested in NYC come join me.
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12:18
From: intricately me
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Is it just me? or do other people get bored too with the injustices that afflict people all over the world? Like for instance when something is played over and over on the news i get tired of hearing it and talking about it. Not because its not important but because there is really nothing i can do and the frustration drives me crazy. For instance, this Sean Bell thing; now i know everyone thinks he is guilty and i know that the general consensus is that New York police are the most corrupt in the country but I'm tired of hearing it... 'he is guilty!!' OK if you say so what exactly do you want me to do about that? people spend millions starting radio stations like free speech radio and so on just to talk about it but they don't really do anything about it... Or how the Kenyan cabinet keeps changing and how just as soon as you sigh with relief thinking the worst is over somebody strikes out...I'm tired of trying to explain that Kenyans are peaceful people because then i just look like an idiot.. Another thing that's pretty annoying is how America is always looking to bully someone and when they cant do it they just move on to another underdog... first it was Korea, then it was Iran now its Syria? Then there are the news items that you see and fill yourself in without reading them, a news title like ' girl killed in new clashes in Gaza' makes you shake you're head and move on...same story different day... That goes for Iraq too no one pays attention anymore and that is really sad.. I see America picking a fight with Iran and i think its unfair to American soldiers and to the rest of the world but again there isn't anything i can do about it is there? People are starving out there because of rising food prices because of rising gas prices, it even has Kenyans siphoning fuel! its sad...but if all you're going to do is talk about it why should i bother listening? I'm not doing anything either and if all we are going to do is talk about it and laugh then why should i participate?
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22:52
From: intricately me
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I had a chance to travel quite a bit in the last few weeks there are alot of really beautiful places in America and I'm blessed to have been privy to them... I went to Boston which is, in my opinion, a college town but it was a road trip so i got to see all the colleges that i aspired to attend as a child, met a few Stanford grads and engaged in titillating conversations... Went for the Vuma concert and enjoyed Kenya's finest artists... that was a lovely concert, the line up was great and the concept behind it was definitely worth it. Then i got to go to the country and that was HEAVENLY, the great outdoors always rejuvenates and revives me... the change of scenery and a chance to relax only add to the wholeness of the experience. Then i finally got to go to Atlanta... i have been curious about Atlanta since i got to the states, I have been to the ATL airport 5 or 6 times and yet i had never set foot outside it so i loved it... It did help that i met some very intelligent people and i got to appreciate very well mastered contemporary art as i fell in deeper in love all in one weekend... what more can one really ask for. i also got to go to see my friends in Maryland and St Patty's in Jersey was the bomb.. I haven't had a chance to read alot though and I'm beginning to find myself lacking in that area also i haven't gone to the movies in the longest time... the little pleasures that complete me lol... i did come across some really interesting books...like Brother I'm Dying- by Edwidge Danticat. Its sensationally sad... i found a really nice Quote book too..."AGE DOESN'T MATTER UNLESS YOU'RE A CHEESE": WISDOM FROM OUR ELDERS its by Katheryn and Ross Petras... Its has some pretty really quirky wise quotes as well. I'm reading the Google book too but that's my train project...[as in i read it on the train]
I really did not realise how dependent i was on the Internet until i didn't have it, and wow... no really i mean WOW!! its not easy living without it. I live my life on the Internet...if I'm not just checking my mail or facebooking, I'm looking for books online or reading the news...using the yellow pages or playing on you tube...looking for directions or shopping... checking out new places or reading about stuff that was mentioned in passing that i was too proud to admit i didn't know... looking for jobs or getting info on how to do stuff...My motto in life is literally life is too short so Google it... i even fix my comp using Google lol i know I'm terribly inadequate without Internet so you can only imagine how irate i was when my comp crashed. This post is dedicated to all the days i lost and as i lovingly kiss my long lost love aka laptop, i vow that i shall never let him go again... He fulfils and completes me and he doesn't care about how corny that sounds....
So as you can already imagine the last few weeks have been devoid of life, i did meet quite a few really interesting people and to some extent i got time to soul search and think about my life, this was all induced by my distressed state of mind because i didn't have access to a comp wow...and again wow.. I even made promises to God...i said 'if you give me my baby back i will cherish him and never let him out of my sight' luckily for me i had a really good man helping me through these hard times constantly comforting me, reminding me that it wasn't that bad, so perhaps i will admit that they are right when they say for every door that closes a window opens. OK anyway its late and i haven't blogged for months i will continue tomorrow when i find an interesting topic until then....
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2:26
From: intricately me
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I think words are a very dangerous tool... they are malleable, you could shape them into anything you want them to be. u could use them for the better good or for the alternative. I was telling my friend the other day that information sharing without complete knowledge is like committing a crime... to me its true... politicking and gossiping without complete information has caused some of the greatest wars in history.. and broken some of the best friendships. The worst mistakes can and have been made because of something misheard or something misread. I try to be impartial but i know that i too am very opinionated and that too is a way of spreading rumors, misinformation... But i try and i try hard not to get involved in things that are beyond my realm. I decided to listen to people more and i realise the more you listen the more you catch those tiny nuances... things that tell you how people feel about you... I think not listening would probably have been a better idea because i got terribly hurt. I started reading this book by Dave Eggers'What is the wha t' and i have to admit its probably one of the better books i have read in the last few years, the first few paragraphs are captivating at least but its the way the guy describes things that drew my attention,in regards to my friends at some point he says' i lost someone very close to me and afterward i believed i could have saved him had i been a better friend to him. But everyone disappears, no matter who loves them.' That just brought it home for me... I had a really emotional moment right there. Its true he coined a phrase perfectly. Everyone does disappear....after all the years you spend letting people into your life to judge you and hurt you after a while they fizzle away and you wonder was it worth it? There is nothing i hate more then losing a friend. Ok i lie, there is nothing i hate more then finding out one of my friends isn't really genuine then after that i hate losing a friend. To me its almost like someone died the pain remains and the hollowness is vast i still naively believe in friendship i will drop everything in the blink of an eye to help an the problem with that is im always doing it but in return i get nothing. People tend to be very petty. Anyway i digress on page 13 of this book [did i mention i just started reading it] he writes 'I am tired of this country. I am thankful for it, yes, I have cherished many aspects of it for the three years i have been here, but i am tired of the promises. I came here, four thousand of us came here, contemplating and expecting quiet. Peace and college and safety. We expected a land without war and, i suppose, a land without misery. We were giddy and impatient. We wanted it all immediately-homes,families, college, the ability to send money home, advanced degrees, and finally some influence. But for most of us, the slowness of our transition-after five years i still don't have the necessary credits to apply for a four year college-has wrought chaos. We waited ten years in Kakuma and i suppose we did not want to start all over here. We wanted the next step, and quickly. But this has not happened not in most cases, and in the interim, we have found ways to spend the time. I have held too many menial jobs, and currently work at the front desk of a health club, on the earliest possible shift, checking in members and explaining the club's benefits to prospective members. This is not glamorous, but it represents a level of stability unknown to some. Too many have fallen, too many feel they have failed. The pressure upon us, the promises we cannot keep with ourselves-these things make monsters of too many of us.' This is by far one of the most well written books i have seen in the last few years... America has taught me alot. People are not what they seem and they are definitely not who you think they are. Everybody has a reason to be here and some are more fortunate than others but it would be nice if we remembered why we were here. There are alot of people who came to this country with nothing and from nothing and its a tremendous struggle to just stay alive but nobody seems to notice. Have we forgotten where we came from have we gotten comfortable with what is not ours. Remember it is after all the 'American' dream...emphasis on American. Do we want to let go of who we are and our dream for this? If i remember correctly when we had nothing we still had morals and God and each other so what has changed? if nothing else at least we should remember our brothers whose plight is worse than ours and help them, perhaps that might help us absolve ourselves of the sin we commit by living lavishly and spending extravagantly once we begin to forget... Its so sad!! its sad.
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1:40
From: intricately me
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I had been trying, for a long time, to influence my friends into coming to Kenya.. and my argument is always 'you will love it..! the people are peaceful the place is beautiful what more could you ask for?" but now I'm choking on those words...I was talking to one of my friends the other day, and i was raving on about how i would have never thought that we would still be fighting and he said ' it wont last long don't worry...we like money and pints too much to fight for long' I was laughing at this of course but something in his words ring true to me. I always thought Kenyans hated confrontation, was always speaking about how many tribes we had and about how we managed to somehow all live together peacefully... i thought we were a great example to other countries in Africa because we somehow managed to live and work together for the greater good and accept each other,I saw a great future for Kenya and i thought we were on the precipice of change; we were just about to become one of the most advanced countries in Africa.. but alas...
I'm sitting watching Kenya and i keep wondering what went wrong? did i just turn a blind eye to the hate? did i convince myself that Kenyans were incapable of violence of hate? because this makes me question everything i believe about my country... how could i be so wrong? I used to think that only 500 people in Kenya really knew what was going on the rest think they do but they are privy to information that isn't as accurate or as complete.. Now i really just don't know what to think.I was homesick... dying to come back to my country... my home... Now I'm not sure, i keep wondering how i can live with this hate, i keep wondering if i just never really knew the people that i spent my whole life loving. This subject is even hard to write on because describing the emotions i experience thinking about this is impossible...I'm shaken to my core and I'm so confused. I dont think i will ever understand. i have cherished my innocent childish dreams about my country and now my naivete has been shattered... which is very sad because there isn't a place i long for more...or a place i miss...Kenya represents everything to me...my dreams were born in Kenya, my thoughts shaped, my love fulfilled... was that all a sham? is there a place to come back to? are the people the same people i knew or are they hate filled animals craving revenge? i not sure i could live with people like that... im not sure i could have for all these years... i dont think Kenyans are like this at all.... I guess this is a life lesson only time will tell...
I pray for peace...but i wonder will it ever end? i hope my country is still holding her proud face up but i wonder if we can be proud of this...?
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22:37
From: intricately me
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Im looking around and all i see is a world destroying itself from within...Kenyans are killing each other because some politician decided to use tribalism to divide and rule... Iraq...where thousands of people have died because another clever politician thought it would help the economy of his country if he instigated a war. the Congo, where several generations have died because of a stone which some tycoon will put on his wife's finger. the gulf where religious wars have plagued their nations and policians seem to think thats its ok to let the divide exist because it aids their cause. and then their is a problem thats similar although different in nature like india where the darker people are untouchables so society looks down upon them[thats an understatement] society goes on with life as if they dont exist...Chad where the rebels rule!!Somalia where in-clan fighting has caused years and years of dissention, destroyed the country and left it an empty hull void of anything but long gone memories of what once was and what could have been[ kenyans should learn from this by the way]
Global warming is now a reality and not a rumour from some scientists mouth, technology has overtaken us and is probably much more advanced than it is now, religion is not what it once was its now a corrupted and convoluted concoction thats used more for financial gain than for the believers... This list is endless my point is am i wrong to be disillusioned?
If there is anyone who knows of anyway i can help anywhere...I would appreciate a comment...
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3:21
From: intricately me
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This man was a leader and a half...i got the shivers it felt like he spoke yesterday http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ox2A7uG32Vk
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19:45
From: intricately me
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I would like to help with the relief efforts in Kenya, if you need any volunteers or if you know of any way in which i could help, please leave a comment on my page with your contact details and i will get back to you. I have alot of experience in relief work and i would really like to help get our beautiful country out of these trying times in one piece. Its extremely frustrating to watch and hear about the plight of my fellow Kenyans and yet be unable to do anything to help so i would appreciate any responses in regards to this.
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